Merry Widow
by Mike Lawless
Merry Black Widow
by Keith Graham
The Merry Widow
by Jeffrey P. McManus
The Merry Widow
by Bill Wright
The Merry Widow
by Lazarus
White Velvet Dress
by Phenokiie
Dora's Box
by William Doren
The Rise and Fall of My Roommates, and its Applications to Western Society
by Tuberider
The Merry Widow
by P.J. Wolf
The Merry Widow
by Zepp
The Merry Gladiator
by Colin Campbell
Bill Wright
THE MERRY WIDOW
** MARCH 19 ** I was talking to one of my goldfish today (Suzy). She said that Providence doesn't visit them any more. She gave me a real smug look, too. I'll have to ask her about it later. My daughter just fell off her bike & skinned both her elbows.
** March 22 ** I asked Suzy who "Providence" was. Suzy gave me the same smug look & swam off. She's getting to be as bad as some people I know!
** MARCH 23 ** It's really weird. All the other fish flock around Suzy. now. She won't pay any attention to me. I can't figure it out.
** MARCH 26 ** One of these days, I've got to clean the pond, but it hardly seems worth it. None of them will so much as cast a glance my way. They used to be my friends!
** MARCH 27 ** My ex-wife (damn her!) retrieved her little girl today. It's really lonely now. I guess today is as good a day as any to clean the pond. Maybe if I trap Suzy in one corner, maybe she'll talk to me again?
(later) So that's it! =I= am "providence". I should've seen it. Whenever I clean the pond, put in new plants and guppies for feed, I am "Providence" who is a god-like figure from the Hideen World. Since the water's surface is a partial mirror to them, my world flickers in and out. Must be strange to them. Boy, is Suzy pissed! What did I do? After all, they were the ones who named me "Providence".
** MARCH 28 ** My boss fired me today. He's a jerk!
** MARCH 29 ** Pissed or not, Suzy is going to talk to me today. I've got some chicken wire. I'll corral her in one corner & I won't let her out until she tells me what's going on.
(later) The bitch! She told everybody else that I was her lover, and therefore she was Queen Susanna. But she didn't think it out, did she? Ha! If Providence is her lover, then none of the other males dare get near her. When she really got horny, she told the boys that I was gone.
That's why all the other fish were flocking to her. She must've really been putting out (the pheromones, that is). And when I showed up again, that ruined her act! Serves her right! I don't need her anyway! GOODBYE, SUZY!
** JUNE 11 ** I've decided to give Suzy another chance. I'll bet she misses me by now!
** JUNE 12 ** Typical bureaucrats! My unemployment has expired. And Suzy won't acknowledge her name any more. She says she's The Merry Widow now that I'm gone for keeps. Well, I'll show her. I'm going to drown myself in the pond, and my rotting body will kill them =all=. I read up about it in a book. Sometimes even a single rotting flower stem is enough to poison a fish bowl.
Yeh, that's the problem with being a widow, Suzy! You have to dispose of the body somehow. Ha! I wonder what you'll do now!