95Jun15 6:48 pm from Nigel Mikey! RAD! Good to see you! I wash dishes! 95Jun15 8:24 pm from Norbus Click! 95Jun15 10:11 pm from Formula 409 So, Nigel is the old Dishwasher? 95Jun15 10:24 pm from Zeylan I'm having Gooble flashbacks again. Someone please medicate me. 95Jun16 12:23 pm from Formula 409 Uh, oh. Zeylan is swooning. Get the cot. 95Jun16 4:53 pm from Psyche Get the cot. I'll make a note of that. 95Jun16 6:13 pm from Formula 409 Too late. Zeylan's hit the floor hard. Get the smelling salts. Nigel, put a towel in Zeylan's mouth so he doesn't bite off his tongue. 95Jun17 4:13 pm from Swagman Yeah, don't forget to tie his shoelaces together. 95Jun17 4:43 pm from Formula 409 Oh man I hate to see a grown man twitching and drooling like that. This reminds me of the Rubber Cement-Q we had at Blaylock's a few years back. Damnest thing, how those Mormons give the thumbs up to rubber cement because there's nothing in the Bible or Book of Mormon saying to stay away from the stuff. "Sola scriptura", that's what they say. Anyway, the party got a little out of hand when Colin started to take off his clothes and show his scars. Misha shouted "No for the love of God NO" and then got whacked right in the face with the tire iron Psyche used to always carry around. Knocked him right out. You could almost see birds flying around his head. Well, wasn't long after that that the cops came (and you should have seen the Libertarian clique hit the road when they heard those sirens.)
94Aug11 9:32 pm Things to learn from Angst Your train of thought has a lot of track switches.
94Aug14 8:58 pm from Real Mike Swanson Bactine is good for Llama bite.
94Aug14 10:51 pm from The REAL Hobgoblin I had an interesting experience with a rat today. Allow me to relate the story to you all. So. My cat brings in some animal though the kitty door in my window and immediately drops it in the middle of the floor. The animal, a big pregnant rat, scurries off into the closet and hides. Oh shit. So the cat chases it and the rat runs to the other side of the room and hides. Oh shit. After this goes on another time, I scream for help. Ha ha ha. So. I get this lacrosse stick out to pick up the rat and throw it out the door, but I couldn't catch it. Anyway, my dad comes in and throws about 100 magazines onto the floor, along with everything on my bed. Then the rat jumps out from behind the bed and runs at my dad, who is standing over the cat. My dad screams and jumps in the air and I guess that startled the cat, because she jumped straight up in the air too. Then my dad catches the cat in mid air, turns around, and throws the cat at the rat, but misses and the cat hits the wall. So she gets up and goes outside. Anyway, finally the dog chased the rat out of the room and the cat came back and that's the fucking stroy.
94Aug14 8:59 pm from Real Mike Swanson What the hell does "suck my bite" mean?
94May04 4:57 pm from MISSINGPARAMETER Who is that sombody? He has a birthday every day? That is a lot of presents brians. 94May04 5:26 pm from Luminary Coremaster When is Santa Claus' birthday? Did Jesus receive gifts from Santa when he was born? Was Santa one of the original Three Wise Men? Or were there actually SIX Wise Men, after one of them had a stroke and they kept getting replacements?
94May04 10:24 pm from Luminary Coremaster I asked my physics teacher, "What's the uncertainty principle?" and he replied, "I'm not sure." Just kidding.
94May04 4:52 pm from MISSINGPARAMETER Some times I go to basket robbins for ice cream. They have the most flavers in the world. They have so many I can hardly beleive it.
94May04 2:57 pm from brian But he is very nice zeylans. Dont forget to say that. 94May04 4:55 pm from MISSINGPARAMETER Zeylans knows all the bad werds. May be he will teach them to you newstyle. Then you will half some thing to rite in your mesages that makes sense. 94May04 5:23 pm from Luminary Coremaster I am very convinced that brian and MISSINGPARAMETER are not the same person. brian has actually gone through a metamorphis throughout his years on the boards. I remember when he called the Enterprize and would type very incoherent messages all in caps. It's odd, but he seems to be almost growing... And if this is intentional, or just coindicental, I do not know. MISSINGPARAMETER, on the other hand, while being a comrade and peer to brian, does not have that certain element that truly makes brian's messages unique. I don't want to accuse him of being a copy, but he DID come later, and indeed brian is the original.
94May04 10:01 pm from ThE nEwStYlE Shut the hell up Misha. Give me a break. Don't waste my time with your gibberish, unintelligible chatter. It makes obvious sense and it is cogent and very articulate. What do you need glasses? If you are going to make a remark about what I've said, then criticize it and let's get into a real discussion. These blatant inane remarks of yours are tiresome and annoying. I don't go around quibbling like a fucking mesquito to what you post. I could care less what you post, because I will ignore. For you have showed me repeatedly unintelligible drivel. Speak if you have something intelligent to say, make an argument. But these artless, unimaginative, vacuous, objections are not worth the amount of brain cells it takes to concentrate on them. The request of another user precipitated this expatiation. This is called philosophizing, having a discussion, for the beautiful sake of knowledge. 94May04 10:47 pm from Charlotte Sometimes Well! 94May05 7:28 am from Misha Newstyle, you're working yourself up in a lather. Amazing variety, though; you said the same thing over and over with about 10 different sentences. You mix formal, stiff sentences with colloquial (and often unworkable) ones. "Quibbling like a fucking mesquito [sic]"? Is that bad? I can't tell. Brian and I are convinced you are Racter, Newstyle.
94May31 9:35 pm from Zeylan I like writing here, and on other systems like this one. I mean, the thoughts come and here they are. Kapoof. Kersplotz. Some of the journal stuff I've written in the past was utter shit, it didn't even make sense. I'd start writing about something important and then all of a sudden I'd be typing nothing about nothing. Typical journal-type entry from when I was in high school: Something like this... "So okay. So this guy in the hallway has this locker next to mine, and he thinks that keeping his gym clothes in there is somehow going to make me like him more, like I'm going to bond with him because I've become familiar with his worst smells. Like I'm some sort of bloodhound of his. And today was particularily bad, I mean I could smell crotch from outside my goddamned math class, and then to walk down the hall and realise it was coming from the fucking locker next to mine. And people are walking past me as I'm getting my books, and they're practically throwing up, and they're looking at me as if I just crawled out of someone's ass. It's not like I can say, 'hey it's not me' and try to deny it, then it really makes me look stupid. So I have to sit there and deal with it like I'm an olfactory leper when it's not even my fault. That bastard. He has to put his sweaty underwear in his book locker. God only knows what he keeps in his gym locker; probably severed heads and pickled testicles. Pig fetuses. I have no idea. And I've said to him, I've said 'get your act together and get this shit out of your locker before it bursts into flames already.' But he doesn't listen. It's like he doesn't even speak English. Hell, maybe he doesn't. In fact, I don't remember him ever saying a single word since I've been trapped next to him. And I think his name is something Spanish, something that starts with an L or S, or P. I don't remember. I'm terrible with names. I can remember faces, especially ugly faces, but never names. Faces are easy. The uglier, the easier. It's like when you see a train wreck up close, you get sick looking at it but you just can't turn away. And it keeps you up at night, sweating and screaming because it's so horrendous, and it replays in your head really slowly. That's how it is with ugly faces. Every contour, every wrinkle, every tooth out of alignment, it's all amplified to the point where it's now a big monster mural. I knew this one girl, oh fuck it's painful to even remember this, and she was so ugly it looked like someone had put out a fire on her face with an icepick. And she had this thing for me. She used to follow me around and talk to me in that slurred voice, with that breath... Ugh, I'm shuddering. She'd slip me little notes written in that troglodyte scrawl of hers, asking me why I never call her. Maybe it's because I don't have a universal translator and I'm not fluent in Gorilla. Sometimes I even say shit like that to her, and she doesn't even care. She giggles! She thinks I'm charming or something. I want to take a shower every time I pass her, I want to scrape two layers of skin off my body when she accidentally brushes me. Or maybe she brushes me on purpose. Christ, this is making me vomit. I just had lunch and I'm about to spill it out all over this desk. Then my keyboard won't work and I'll send her the bill for making me physically sick onto my computer equipment. And I bet I'd win if it went to court; the judge would take one look at her and rule in my favor after throwing up all over his gavel. He might even sentence her for being Willfully Ugly in Public View. It's times like this when I almost wish that we did that thing that the Arabs do. And no, I don't mean buy up every goddamned thing in California and open up a 7-11, I mean that thing where they make their women wear veils. But we'd only do it to the ugly ones. I mean, it'd really be a pisser if you bought a wife only to take the veil off later and discover that you've married the Prince of fucking Darkness. How can they stand it? What do they do for fun, have Wet Veil contests? 'Ooh, Acchkkkmed, look at the nose on that one! You can almost see her nostrils!' 'Yes, Jaccccchhhhwar, I am going to have an orgasm, fetch me my camel.' 'I'll buy that one for two bags of sand!' Fucking amazing how they can live in the desert, it's so fucking hot. It's like a mile from the sun." Now you see why I don't keep a journal.
94Jun01 4:15 pm the Spirit of Radio from By-tor was that the one with the chick with the 44ddd? or was it 56ddd? 94Jun01 7:29 pm This is from Zeylan I saw this one bitch while I was flipping channels, she was on one of those shows, I don't remember which. "Geraldo" or "sLeeza" or "Judy" or "Steve" or whichever one, I don't think it matters. Anyway, this chick had the biggest tits I had ever seen in my life. Bigger than her head. Bigger than her TORSO. I'm surprised her rib cage didn't collapse from the weight. She was really thin except for these fucking medicine-ball tits, and she said she weighed 375 pounds, and most of it was TIT. She was like a 4000 with an X cup. Normally I like a robust woman but this was making me throw up. So she's talking about how wonderful it is to be a mutant, and how she was a stripper, and she would never get a reduction no matter what. Then Geraldo or Migueldo or whoever it was asked her to stand up and walk around for a minute. She couldn't do it. She stood up and damn near fell over, she couldn't walk faster than an old fart with a cane. In fact, she says normally she gets around with a walker. Twenty-three years old and she uses a WALKER for chrissakes, and she's saying how great it is to have these elephantic titties. And it's not even attractive, like I said, I was wanting to throw up. I had to physically restrain myself from projecting my barf, do you understand what I am saying? It was inhuman. All I can say is that if I ever had to be stranded on a life raft with one person, it'd be her. We'd float forever. Unless she was too topheavy and kept tipping us over. And oh my god, the sharks; those tits would feed the Atlantic ocean, I hadn't thought about that. Okay, nevermind, scratch the lifeboat, but if I was a cannibal, oh boy.
94Jun01 4:46 pm from Sputnik I hope there a sundowner tonight!!!!!!!! 94Jun01 7:32 pm This is from Zeylan Oh for god's sake, shut the fuck up. "I hope there a sundowner, duh huhuhuh pickle." You've obviously never lost your fucking house to a fire. I have. Sundowner winds are not "cool, huhuhuh." It's numbskulls like you that want to go and start fires in weather like this. You deserve to die, you deserve to have the devil wipe his ass with you in Hell.
94Jun02 2:41 pm from Hobgoblin You shut the fuck up, By-Tor. There is already an abundance of dumbshits around me. You just add to it. I guess it won't make a bit of difference, actually. So nevermind. Do whatever the fuck you want. You're still stupid.
94Jun03 6:34 pm from Sicko @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara And it looks like Prima has no life either.. if I spent that much time babying my hard drive, then I should have a license to marry it or something.
94Jun06 1:00 pm from brian Brown recluse marks look like vialins. They are small and look like ordinary spiders. Until they bite you. Then you will get very sick and die. 94Jun06 12:39 pm from Jabba I still haven't seen a brown recluse spider, or if I have, I don't recognize it. "Brown and has a mark on its back" is what all those little spiders that live along my baseboard look like. I must kill about a dozen of those a week. They move really fast, but kinda random so they look like they're drunk. Sometimes they'll run around in circles on the ceiling. They stop every few seconds, like they're waiting for something to happen, then they move again. These little lamers can't be brown recluse, can they? They've dropped on me dozens of times and I'm still alive.
94Jun05 11:24 pm from Luminary Coremaster Shel Silverstien? I take it this wasn't from his books of collected childrens' poems. Ow. Ow. Ow. You know how you always close your eyes when you sneeze? I just found out why the body usually does that. Ow. Ouch. Ow.
94Jun08 12:01 pm from Swagman I learned a song, but I only know some of the words. Can anybody post the full lyrics for Bob Dylan's "The Times They Are A'Changin'" for me? 94Jun08 1:47 pm from Zeylan Hmm... I'll post what I can understand from listening to it... "(in a nasal, obnoxious monotone) Oooooh, uuhhh, hom time-ah zeeb dom hyma! Ewwwww con tyna bin dun uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuw! Eeeeeeeuuuuuu taaaaaaaam dey ah uh chaaaane gin! Eeeeeuuuuhuooo." Or something. 94Jun08 1:48 pm from Zeylan You can tell that my appreciation for Bob Dylan as a singer isn't very profound.
94Jun21 7:25 pm from ThE nEwStYlE Zeylan, I really don't see why or for what purpose we became anti-eachother. 94Jun21 7:44 pm from Mordrak Satan made him do it. 94Jun21 8:22 pm from Colin Campbell I saw an accident Sunday, a single-vehicle bicycle accident. I crashed and broke my right femur right at the hip. Snapped the femoral ring. Ow. I now have three pins stuck in there. Newstyle, you and Zeylan are antithetical because Zeylan thinks about what he writes before he writes and during the writing process. Thus his posts are concise and meaningful.
94Jun13 10:08 am from BOXHEAD When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did - in his sleep. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.
94Jun24 8:26 pm Mental Liquid from Luminary Coremaster It's my business if I want to be a geek all the time or not. And Zeylan, yo' momma's so fat, that she uses satellite dishes for bra cups. 94Jun25 1:06 pm This is from Zeylan Yo momma's so hairy, she looks like a chiapet with a sweater on.
94Jun25 5:15 pm This is from Zeylan I'm already registered to vote, but I decided to register twice. The other name I registered under is "Merkin Frapis." For some stupid reason, that seemed to amuse me at the time. (A merkin is, well, sort of a pubic hair wig, it's like fake pubic hair or something, and you already know that frapis is naturally red pubic hair.) Now I'm getting all this fucking junk mail addressed to Merkin Frapis. This should be interesting to see just how much mailing shit I get as a direct result of registering to vote.
94Jun25 3:32 pm Ocean Size from Yacub What does Tony the Tiger say? 94Jun25 5:22 pm This is from Zeylan "Fuck you, Murray, you're my agent! Now get out there and renegotiate my contract! I don't promote one more fucking bowl of this frosted shit until I get double scale. I get more money or I swear I'll eat one of these fucking kids, I'm serious. I got car payments, Murray! Now get with it or you're fired, you miserable bastard. I'll be over here peeing on the rug." 94Jun25 5:24 pm This is from Zeylan Or did you mean what he says ON camera?
94Jun27 8:54 pm from Swagman Yeah Lumie, I never had wet dreams either. I guess I beat off too much. But of course, every authority told me I'd go blind or insane so I quit the abnoxious self-abuse habit and the wet-dreams came back. The wet dreams ended some years ago upon the first successful conquest of the elusive and shy two-legged split-tail amazon. Nothing has been quit the same since, non-plussed in fact. 94Jun27 9:49 pm from Homer the Rat absence of wet dreams is a symptom of penile cancer -- and the choice of castration or death. are there any males on this bbs who do not experience wet dreams on a daily basis? if so, i urge you, in the name of God, to put an end to your misery now.
94Jun28 5:25 pm This is from Zeylan Look, just because Barney is stupid and everyone KNOWS IT doesn't make it a fad. Fuck him, I think he's a big purple faggot. And fuck that gay yellow dragon lesbian he hangs out with. They're strange and lame. Just look at these kids ten years from now and ask them why they're all in therapy. "It was that fucking Barney! Get away! Aaaah!" Barney teaches children that it's okay to be a simp. 94Jun28 6:01 pm Mental Liquid from Luminary Coremaster I fullheartedly agree, Zeylan. I've seen Barney, and fad or no, I hate that show. It's incredibly dull and it doesn't even hold a candle to the educational benefits of REAL childen's programming like "Seseme Street." Barney is a fad, and he'll probably be more or less gone in a few years. At least the Muppets are entertaining and have jokes for both children AND parents to enjoy. Barney just sits there singing "Don't go in a stranger's car, always run away." a few hundred times in a row. My god, I just realized how he fills the show's time slot while having such an incredibly low amount of actual content--- It's those cursed repetative songs that he sings relentlessly for hours on end. It's like the producers are farsighted, and the songwriter just made a macro of one line in the song and copied it on the page a few hundred times, so they said, "Okay, looks good, sing that." 94Jun28 8:15 pm Kaplan Sucks from By-tor barney is lame. Period. I don't hate him cause all my friends do, I hate him cause he is boring, loud, obnoxious, humorless, immature, looks funny, cadaverious, and many others... 94Jun28 8:32 pm Make me laugh from Lack of Sleep hey I never said Barney was anywhere near as good as Sesame street. Sesame Street is a show I even like today. I even watched it yesturday. Elmos is the best, except for Snuffy and Grover. It has lost a little of it's charm since Jim died. Back then it was PFnR. I wish the Muppet's Show was still on the air. 94Jun28 9:27 pm This is from Zeylan I don't ever remember The Muppet Show being "PFnR". I never remember Sesame Street being "punk fuckin rock". I distinctly remember all the music being rather folkish with sort of a polka thing happening, but never punk fucking rock. I've never seen any muppets in a mosh pit, or anyone skinning Big Bird, or any of that shit. The closest I've seen to that is when Oscar the grouch broke bottles over his head and ate garbage, and even that was mild. Sure, Big Bird took lots of drugs and saw giant talking elephants that nobody else saw, but that's to be expected. I mean, hey, he was a freak, he's entitled. If I was a seven foot tall ostrich-chicken hybrid, I'd be injecting cocaine into my eyeballs, too. And Cookie Monster obviously had an eating disorder, and that guy Bob was obviously the show's token child molester, and look at that old bastard Mr. Hoople. I swear I remember a whole show where the word of the day was "senile" and they were all down at Mr. Hoople's drug store. And I don't care what anyone says, Bert and Ernie were not gay. Jesus fucking christ. I don't know where people get that shit. They're god damned puppets, they don't have sex, they don't even have assholes. They just live together because they're too poor to live on their own, Ernie is too fucking stupid to get a job. And Bert had a weird thing for pidgeons. If anyone had anything sexual going on, it was Bert and Big Bird.
94Jun28 10:42 am from Hobgoblin The new generation has learned to tie their own shoes. 94Jun28 2:49 pm Swing Grrrl from Psyche Pepsi, the choice of the new generation. I bet the Pepsi people were hoping to call us the Pepsi generation, but alas we are generation X. Douglas Coupland probably hates that. 94Jun28 5:26 pm This is from Zeylan Fuck that Generation X bullshit. I say we're Generation G-spot. 94Jun28 6:10 pm Mental Liquid from Luminary Coremaster Yeah... "Generation X"? I shudder at the thought of a nation-wide legion of Joaquins. 94Jun28 8:51 pm Make me laugh from Lack of Sleep Only Zeylan is in the Generation-X catagory. We, the ones still in our teens, are not what they are calling Generation X. I don't think we have been labled yet. 94Jun28 9:32 pm This is from Zeylan You guys are Generation Hopeless. At least we have a fighting chance, but you guys are into Snoop Doggy Dogg and Pogs and shit. Doomed from the word go.
94Jun29 6:50 am Shit happens from Hobgoblin Hm. So I've got an MCF now. Oh well. Allow me to tell a little story. See, when I was about 4, I was driving around with my Grandma in her 1976 El Camino. It was the traditional butt-ugly brown color that El Caminos usually came in... the Mariachi music was blaring out of the AM radio, there was tons of horse manure and gardening soil in the back, and there were a couple of plants to boot. So, anyway, we pulled up in heavy traffic at the intersection of State Street and Los Positas and came to a stop in the middle lane about 6 cars back from the light... about where the entrance to that little nursery is. Of couse, it was in the middle of the summer and it was hotter'n Hell out, so I rolled down the window because the air conditioning wasn't working all that well. I didn't have my seatbelt on, and I managed to grab the door handle as well while rolling down the window.... which means that the door came opened and I fell out. The only problem was the the light had turned green and my Grandma had just stepped on tehaccelerator. So, if you can picture a small boy of 4 years old standing in the middle of traffic next to an El Camino.... Getting on the with story. So, as she began to go faster, I thought I had better try to catch up before she left me stranded in the middle of the street. So I ran as fast as I could and grabbed onto the door handle on the inside of the door. This was ok, and I shouted "Grandma! Grandma! Nanny Omi!" She told me to shut up. The car goes faster. I start running along side of the car, still holding onto the door handle. "Nani OMI! HELP! HELP! HELP! ." My cries for help were muffled by the Mariachi music and the loud noise of engines all around us. "SHUT Up," the tells me. By this time, we were about to the intersection, going fairly fast, and I was having severe problems keeping up with the car. In fact, it had come to the point where I woudl have to take huge jumps and hold onto the door... you know, I could've set a age-category record for the long jump. Oh well. And then I'd hang on to the door and drag my feet a bit and then I'd try and jump, then I'd drag along for a bit, then I'd jump. Well, anyway, FINALLY people around us started honking at her and I finally strated screaming my head off and crying and FINALLY did my grandmother look at me and say "OH SHIT!" So she screetched to a halt and I go rocketing forward and lam into the door face first and get back into the car and drive home. Moral of the story : make your old people wear hearing aides.
94Jun30 10:27 pm from Luminary Coremaster Alright, here's a charming tale that I'll share with y'all. Today I was in Isla Vista with some friends. There was a homeless guy who had a dog with him, and he came up to us. He said, "Can I have some spare change to buy dog food? My dog's real hungry." We said, sorry, no. So then he said, "Well, have you got any beer?" We encountered him a second time, and he said, "Alright, if I tell you the dirtiest joke I know, will you give me some spare change?" We declined, so he said, "Alright, well, I'll tell you anyway. So do you know what it's like to have sex with a beautiful girl, a Playboy model with blue eyes and blond hair and great thighs and a great body? I didn't think so." WHAT?!?!?!?! That had to be THE absolute stupidest joke I've ever heard. That was so lame, I couldn't believe it and neither could my friends. I said that perhaps he wasn't telling a joke, and it was just some drunken raving that we happened to be around to witness. Boy oh boy, ya gotta love those wacky homeless people, yessiree. 94Jul01 9:51 am from Zeylan I used to take pity on the homeless here in Santa Barbara, now I utterly ignore them. Fucking assholes. I mean, not all of them are bad, but there are a few. One time, my girlfriend and I were walking on State to go to a movie or from a movie or something, and there was this guy who couldn't have been more than 25 sitting outside of Subway on the ground, looking sullen. "Do you have any spare change?" he asks. I really hate that fucking phrase "spare change" because there's no such thing. None of my money is "spare". I don't keep "spares" in case my regular money goes flat while I'm on the freeway. So instead, I offer to buy this guy a sandwich at Subway, since he's right outside. He was very happy about that, he got a footlong sub with everything on it. He smiled. It was nice. I tried that a few more times, and I got refusals. Most of these fucks just want the money so they can buy smokes, beer, and drugs. Offer them food and they say "no, I want money." Fuck you then, get a job and earn some, asshole. You can stand here all day and bother people who walk by, but you can't shovel shit in a barn somewhere? You can't lick stamps or something? Fuck that, I know there are jobs out there if you're REALLY desperate. There's jobs that nobody wants because they think those jobs are beneath them. But hey, if you're living in your own SHIT I think you're at the point where you should consider it. Most of these bastards standing at freeway offramps don't WANT a job, they make too damn much money standing there with their "Nam Vet" sign. I know plenty of VietNam veterans who have steady jobs and own their own business and don't shit on themselves and eat garbage. So I don't buy that excuse. A good friend of mine was a "Nam Vet" who wound up hospitalized for PTSD at one point. He was REALLY fucked up. And yet, he owns his own business now. He got over it, moved on. He's not living in a cardboard box and begging other people to give him their money to buy his beer. Bastards. Fucking wastes of plasma. Then they bitch about their "rights". They should be given the right to fucking kill themselves. I'll even buy their bullets. But there's this one guy that Lisa and I have seen on State a few times, he stands there with his hand out, and as you walk by he says "spare some change" almost inaudibly. He has this expression of total despair and grief on his face. It's all she and I can do to keep from sobbing as we walk past. But I still ignore him; he looks like he could flip a hamburger as good as the next guy. 94Jul01 12:02 pm from BOXHEAD I've had my dealings with the homeless as well. I don't help them out because they can work for their money/booze. The other morning, I was in Mac's Grog and Groc, and I saw a few homeless dudes scoring 3 40 ouncers, 1 fifth of vodka, a pack of cigarettes and some Gatorade. To pay for this "fortune of alcohol," they had nothing but pennies, nickels, and dimes. Fuckers. This was at 7 in the morning too. I was right behind them waiting for an eon. Whenever they ask for me change, I just say, "nope." I try to treat these people with respect 90% of the time. However, if I am in a bad mood, I kinda lay into them.
94Jul03 1:59 pm Don't get hammered! from Psyche LEAVE. Please. LEAVE. GET OUT. FUCK YOU. Leave my room. DO NOT POST A WORD. DO NOT SAY A THING. LEAVE. SYSOP, PLEASE, DELETE THIS ROOM. I am pissed at all of you. FUCK YOU.
94Jul03 2:09 pm Don't get hammered! from Psyche Yeah.THIS, you. Luminary: This is so absurd. GODAMMIT. I am almost mad. It's just so annoying to be trying to get someone who will never have an "open" mind to try and see things from another's point of view. The point is this: YOU CAN NOT BE SURE OF THERE BEING SPIRITS, GHOSTS, GODS, ASTRAL PROJECTION, OR ANYTHING. YOU CAN NOT BE SURE. YOU CAN NOT PROVE IT TO ANOTHER PERSON. When you come on here, swaggering about and saying in your condescending manner, "Well folks, just remember thaty ghosts AREN'T the spirits of dead people." WHat the hell. It seems to me that that statement was an attempt to stir up controversy with something you KNOW no one will believe you on. JEsus. YES, it is possible that ghosts are the remains of dead people. YES, it is possible they aren't. But for you to be a mouthpiece for someone else's beliefs, and not taking an agnostic viewpoint where one is apppropriate, strikes me as naive, closeminded, brash, and obnoxious.
94Jul12 2:11 pm from Hobgoblin I got more junk mail for Secure Horizons today. What a bunch of shit. Dear Medicar recipient, Is the health care coverage you're receiving from Medicare what you expected? Are you getting incresingly frustrated with Medicare's slow reimbursements and claims refused blah blah blah for 3 fucking pages. I took the liberty of sending back their pre-paid postage and used the business reply card. I wrote "Don't send me this crap for the next half a century. I'm sick of it. By the time I need this, the money you waste on postage will have put you out of business, not to mention your poor management." 94Jul12 2:11 pm from Hobgoblin I know, you don't have to tell me. I'm such a stud.
94Jul15 11:54 am from Mordrak hey swag, you have a talented child. Have you opened him up yet to see how he works?
94Jul13 11:08 pm Mental Liquid from Luminary Coremaster Zeylan crushes the hosts of MTV to make Snapple. 94Jul14 12:20 am adopt an aardvark from Mike Swanson Zeylan spits in every Snapple bottle.
94Jul13 11:44 pm from Hobgoblin What the hell kind of crap is this tooth fairy BS. Who thought up that concept?! I mean, did some one bag just say one day "hey little child, put your rotten tooth under your pillow and this winged thing will come by and give you money for it. Hu hu. ?! I mean, I guess I liked it when I was a kid, but it s kind of absurd.
94Jul25 9:33 am To Psyche from Psyche Did you know that evian spelled backwards is naive?
94Jul26 9:26 am CongealedCholestrol from Wraith Fuck you, you piece of crap. Who the fuck are you calling cynical?
94Jul27 11:57 pm Rings on her Hand from Psyche Can I share something? I saw this woman tonight, and I mean, GOD. She was the most BEAUTIFUL thing I have ever seen. She had two children and she was wearing all these flowy knitted things and had a hat on and blond hair. She was SO WONDERFUL. She was like an angel. I'm in love. I'll never see her again.
94Jul31 11:01 pm from Amarantheus @ Swagland BBS _ Dublin, Ireland Kids, kids, kids. The bible is a bunch of STORIES and a manual for telling people who lived thousands of years ago how to live. It's funny how those who will quote the Bible verbatim to prove a point often act only on others interpretations of the book. 94Aug01 12:21 am from Luminary Coremaster @ Swagland BBS _ Dublin, Ireland Do I believe in the Bible? Hey, I've SEEN one!
94Aug02 12:31 pm Pick me Pick me Yea from Yacub I've had sex. I'm cool. When it comes to fucking, trust ME. *I'm* the expert on fucking chicks. Just as Psyche and Airalin. THEY know. Me, I'm a sex maniac. 12 inches of raw manhood here. I've had sex on swings, in water parks, on a roller coaster, while diving in Hawaii... you name it, I' ve fucked there. Yep, yesiree. When it cums to SEX, I know what the FUCK I'm talking about.
94Jul30 8:11 pm Slippy the Toad from Mike Swanson clique clique clique claque claque claque jump all over lummy's back such a slow reader is lack of sleep he makes Gooble users weep
94Aug02 2:24 pm from asdaSd Sputnik I am Japan. I have no army. But I am better then all of you. 94Aug02 9:01 pm Mental Retention from Wraith Oooh, nice analogy. 94Aug02 9:24 pm from asdaSd Sputnik Thank you. 94Aug02 11:04 pm Mental Retention from Wraith No, i'm just patronizing you. 94Aug02 11:53 pm Sebum from Yacub I am Japan. I have chicken and steak from vending machines, and floating McDonalds offshore. I have underground shopping malls, lots of neon, and I think women are lower than dirt and ready to be raped. My writing looks neat, and I have beautiful forests and ceremonies. I am Japan. My land is barren, but I have built a glittering empire of tradition, corruption, and exploitation. I am a leech, and I am beautiful. 94Aug03 1:41 am Mental Retention from Wraith Uhh..too many repeats of rising sun . Plus, i'll stick to my switzerland. 94Aug03 5:38 am Won eht otni from Lack of Sleep In Japan, a 'joy stick' is a prostitute. A friend of mine just returned from his trip to Japan and his friend that he went with, went to a computer store and asked for a 'joy stick' and he was given directions to an alley two blocks down. Who kNEW. 94Aug03 9:10 am from asdaSd Sputnik fine! Just go ahead and ruin my analogy. Thats just like you! 94Aug03 11:07 am Mental Retention from Wraith and why the hell did he ask for a joy stick in the first place? 94Aug03 11:55 am Slippy the Toad from Mike Swanson Also, in Japan, a "disk drive" is a really tight underwear wedgie. 94Aug03 4:22 pm Slippy the Toad from Mike Swanson In Germany, if you ask for a "dot-matrix printer", a woman will come out of the back room and suck your tonsils out.
94Aug03 5:16 pm Things to learn from Angst I choose this handle because it suit the mood that I was in at the time that I created my account. I wanted to convey the fact that I have troubles without you people having to read about them. And you (any of you) shouldn't judge me by waht I do on Gooble. But now i'm repeating myself. Ahyght, I'm out of here. 94Aug03 8:10 pm This is from Zeylan We shouldn't judge you by what you do here? Bullshit, pal. People are judged by what they do and say. We only know you from what you do here, we don't know you any other way, nor would we want to. So when you're here you'll get judged by what you do here. I don't know if you fuck rabbits, if you shoot crack into your eyeballs, if you like smelling your fingers when nobody is looking. I don't know and I don't wanna know. It's not relevant to what's going on here. All I know of you is what I see, all I know is the content of your vacuous and inane posts about your sexual prowess and your constant obnoxious talk about your dick and your many other pointless opinions and your faggoty little emails to me that say nothing but "Fuck." That's all I have to judge you by, and believe me, that's plenty. 94Aug04 2:06 am Won eht otni from Lack of Sleep HA! Zeylan, that fuck comment was me. I did it. so be it. And a second thing, Zeylan, like he or I even fucking care. You don't exist in the 3+ dementional world as we know it. And another thing, writen words don't mean shit about one's personality. It's how you read it. And no one can ever read someones message and perceive it the way it was meant, if you don't know the person that wrote it well enough. It is similar to inside jokes. You don't get them or find them as funny, if you don't know what the backing to them. If you don't understand that then maybe that is your problem in the first place. Go tickle someone else for a fag. 94Aug04 8:07 am Slippy the Toad from Mike Swanson LoS, that was the most pathetic retort I've ever seen. When you or your little friend get roasted to a crisp by a master like that, take it like a man instead of squeaking like a mouse. 94Aug04 4:59 pm This is from Zeylan WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THESE MORONIC ARGUMENTS? "You don't know me, you have no right to judge me." What kind of sniveling cry for help is that? When you post messages here, we have to assume these are your thoughts. Right? I mean, you do THINK when you post these wastes of ascii, don't you? Maybe you don't, I'm not sure. It certainly doesn't show. But if you DO actually put some feeble thought into your posts while you're online for three hours at a fucking stretch, then it's safe to say that these are your thoughts, your views on things. And if that's the case, then you've given us the perfect fuel to judge you. You don't have to actually SPEAK the words. We can read. And when you open your figurative mouth on this system, you're conveying what you think to the rest of us. We don't have to know you at all, other than what you write. Why should we meet you and be forced to spend any torturous time in your pathetic presence before we're ALLOWED to pass some sort of judgement on you? That's bullshit. And this crap about how nobody can perceive what you really mean when you post a message is the stupidest load of shit I've probably ever heard from you, and that's no small feat. If you're too much of an idiot to convey what you really mean, why bother posting messages at all? By your own admission you apparently have no talent for getting your point across. If what you're spewing is true, then all your messages are false and a waste of time because we didn't hear the tone of your VOICE as you WROTE them. So do us all a favor and grind up your computer in some sort of a wheat thrasher or maybe throw it under a tractor, since obviously you have nothing real or worthwhile to contribute here.
94Aug03 9:12 pm You can't escape from Cyber Stalker Here's a room for all of you Cyber people out there. Please don't forget this room, I didn't create it just to creat another room. 94Aug03 9:06 pm You can't escape from Cyber Stalker This is HELL tryin to read all of these new messages. 94Aug04 1:31 am Won eht otni from Lack of Sleep Cyber stalker, let me guess, YOU created the room Cyberworld. Well if that guess is correct then all I have to say to you is, FUCK YOU AND GET THE FUCKING HINT! You come here and say that it is HELL trying to get through all the new messages and then you go and make ANOTHER ROOM? WHAT, ARE YOU SOOO fucking lame and naive that you don't understand that because of the fucks that keep making new rooms and that is why there are so many new messages? IF my guess is wrong, then, please be kind and don't be fucking lame and naive. 94Aug04 12:32 pm Mental Retention from Wraith A person with the word cyber in their chosen handle should be shot. 94Aug04 5:07 pm This is from Zeylan The phrase "please don't forget this room" is a blatant invitation -- almost a dare -- to immediately forget this worthless room. My finger almost jumped off my knuckle trying to get to the "forget" key.
94Aug04 10:17 am Rhapsody from Psyche God sometimes you just don't come through. o you need a woman to look after you? 94Aug04 12:35 pm Mental Retention from Wraith It wasn't till the other day that i realized psyche was probably just quoting a song. 94Aug04 4:47 pm This is from Zeylan She is. She's quoting a worthless piece of musical diatribe by that slathering yeast-monster Tori Amos.
94Aug09 3:38 pm from ThE nEwStYlE The hell with these stupid awards. The person running the show is already in argument with people who object. How tiresome and annoying. It's already dilapidated into squabbling and a weak tirade. There is no beauty or light in any of this nonsense. And it looks like it is tainted with personal emotion. Have users sunk so low as to try to debase another user because their ego is sensitive and wounded from some previous conflict or debate?? How lofty is such an aim. I remember when I used to have profitable discussions with other users and things were friendly where I would get email. To hell with this idiocy. You're right David. I was out of town and didn't even vote. I choose to ignore fully these petty persevering aims of users who are indeed lost. 94Aug09 4:29 pm from Zeylan Oh pipe down. If you're going to cry, you'll find kleenex in the bathroom. 94Aug09 8:20 pm from Swagman That's a pretty long rant from a person who "chose to ignore fully" all this "tiresome and annoying...squabbling" in lieu of "profitable discussions with other users and things were friendly." 94Aug10 6:58 pm from ThE nEwStYlE No, not a good point at all. Ddx that reaction sounded really contrived. I don't like mass conformity. And Swagman, if anybody, you should back me up. 94Aug11 7:11 am from Swagman Oh, I wasn't intending to tear at your statement particularly, Newstyle, although on rereading I see that is exactly how I sounded. I was just being playful with your language and with the point of your memory where you remember when there were "profitable discussions with other users and things were friendly." I have no such recollections about Swagland, it's always been an obnoxious zoo, full of pointlessness, full of spleen, full of angst, bitterness and disillusion. I don't know why Swagland continues to exist, it's pointless. The Golden Biffs from their very inception have been rude displays of vulgarity. The very first Golden Biffs were created to distract telecom away from Zepp's going away -Q, to provide a distraction, a whirl of noise, a smokescreen, a sham of mirrors. This years event is not that much different, still keeping with the spirit of absurdity, the Golden Biff Committee takes it's work seriously and while I'm not on that committee, I presume to speak for them since the votes are being tallied on my hard drive. I would suggest if any of you are truely disgusted with the categories, to make write in categories and nominate candidates to those categories of your own creation. I believe the voting deadline was the 10th of August, so what. Tell the committee you want an extension, see what happens. Hell, form your own "Happy Biff" committee and remake the awards anew. For that matter, change the name entirely to something completely different. I don't care. I'm pissed off, do you care?! Why should you, it has nothing to do with telecom. It's my own private business, keep out of it. Stay away, leave me alone, don't bug me. Collect your email and leave. Swagland's shutting down for good. I'm sick of it. It's bullshit. How's that for backing you up, Newstyle?
94May10 4:38 pm Mental Liquid from Luminary Coremaster I'd like to carry around a bag of crackers and give them to homeless people who ask me for money, to see what they'd do. If they were sincere, they'd accept the food. If they were looking for booze money, hmm... Maybe they'd throw them at me. 94May10 5:52 pm it was, and came from l&tch once i went to trader joes and bought some chocolate chips. (cheapest kind.) i was hanging around outside waiting for my ride to come out, but it seemed to take him forever. as i was walking around, i got stopped by a panhandler and a guy with a petition. i gave neither of them what they wanted, but they both accepted some chocalate chips. 94May10 7:30 pm I am he who is AB&C from Leqi-Unninni Semi sweet or milk chocolate? 94May10 8:55 pm De plane, Boss! from Yacub hehe. I offered a bum a postcard the other day. He declined. YES! Evergreen! Where did you hear of them, Leqi? Wow! What about Moss Icon? Um uh um uh the shit? Good
94May10 9:55 pm nilbogboH morf from Hobgoblin HAHahhaaAahaHAhahahahahahhAHAhahaHahhahahahah! Ham doesn't GROW! AHhahahA. IT's not a plant! AHahha 94May11 2:55 pm nilbogboH morf from Hobgoblin Listen, mr. buttshit, I thought it was. Just cause you have a lacking sense of humor doesn't mean I do. So pnptbtpbtptbptbtpt. 94May11 4:22 pm Mental Liquid from Luminary Coremaster Why would ham grow? Who thought ham grew? 94May12 6:42 pm Duck Soup from Yacub I am lauging so hard right now. Dueling Genetalia! HAHAH!
94May12 9:58 pm .won eht otni from Boy in the Dark You could say Snuglefuck in the middle of class. tHAT's what I'm gonna do on the last normal day of school before finals. I'll scream it at the top of my lungs. You know, at my larynx.
94May12 7:24 pm nilbogboH morf from Hobgoblin England is great! I went with all these idiots last year and we got in this huge toilet-paper-wad throwing contest out of a hotel room in London and we hit the top of a Jaguar and the guy got pissed off and came in to yell at the manager just as we checked out. It was so much fun. Then we dropped a box full of bangsnaps on a bussload of Japanese tourists. 94May12 8:22 pm All Hail Eris! from Yacub I'm sure they got pictures of you. Did you wear disguises?
94May11 10:38 pm Here is my secret from Psyche huhuhhuhu huhuhuh uhu huh uhuhuh pickle 94May12 7:34 pm nilbogboH morf from Hobgoblin Ok, so I had a little thingy of Jell-O brand chocolate pudding and the pickle-guy comes up to me and says "he hu.. H...ha...havin' fun slurping your puddding?" (Just for the record, I didn't have a spoon) and I said "Yeah...," wodering what he was getting at... so he said "Mmmmm Mmmm! I like to slurp hot pudding myself." What the fuck. What a weirdo. 94May12 7:35 pm nilbogboH morf from Hobgoblin Whoa. I justrealized something. I wonder if that had sexual connotations!?
94May24 3:33 pm This is from Zeylan Get this... My girlfriend watches QVC sometimes to buy stuff for our new house. So this PC dumbshit is on and he's selling oscillating fans, and he's calling them "circulatory air distributors". What the fuck?! It's a FAN! It's inanimate, it's not going to give a shit if you call it a FAN! It's not like it's going to get offended for chrissakes. "I'm not a fan, that's derrogatory. I'm an Oscillating-American." Give me a fucking break.
94Jun06 5:42 pm This is from Zeylan Psyche, I don't give a mighty fucking god damn what you think of me. You're an elitist little snob and I'm sick and fucking tired of you and your presumptuous "I'm so dark and cool and you are dumb" attitude. You can take your opinions of me and wipe your ass raw with them, you can fling yourself in front of a moving vehicle for all I care. Drink piss, eat glass, sew your ass to your face, I don't care. Just fuck off already.
94Aug17 1:05 am from ThE nEwStYlE Misha if you are going to say something at least be witty. 94Aug17 6:32 pm from Colin Campbell That has to be the shortest message Newstyle has ever posted. 94Aug17 7:25 pm from Misha That hurt, Newstyle. Please don't say such hurtful things anymore.
94Aug28 9:33 am from Hannah Smithereen I get to see her tonight. TORITORITORITORI 94Aug28 10:07 am from Real Mike Swanson If you hold hands at the concert everyone will think you are a vegetarian. 94Aug28 10:59 am from Luminary Coremaster Tell me if she masturbates on the piano bench. She does this in her concerts quite often. 94Aug28 1:55 pm from Real Mike Swanson Psyche? 94Aug28 1:55 pm from Real Mike Swanson Oh. Tori. 94Aug28 2:41 pm from Roy Hahahhaahhaa 94Aug28 5:55 pm from Luminary Coremaster Ho-ho! 94Aug28 8:46 pm deep hurting from edward scissorpenis Can you imagine what it's like for the roadies to take apart the set every night after one of Tori Amos's concerts? I bet it's fucking gross. "Bob, it's your turn to load the piano." "Yecch, what's all this smelly sticky shit all over the keys? Did someone spill borscht on this piano?" "God damn that Tori, she's been masturbating in concert again!" What a pretentious cunt.
94Sep01 4:27 pm from Baby Driver I guess one of the greatest things about being me, aside from my wealth, is my ability to say, "bitch, come here," because she always does, no matter who it is. Once there was this group of people, like three couples. And one of the bitches was wearing these shorts that made me think "man, that box has got to be banged....by me." So I said to her, "you let that dork rattle your chains?" and like she giggled and shit a little, so I said, "spend the night with me and you'll be walking funny for a week." And then the guy like tried to stop her, and I laid him out against the brick wall (and they later blamed a bouncer for it), and she and me went back to my place and I nearly ruptured her brain with my huge throng of might. Sometimes like when I'm wearing tight clothing like my leather pants, my groinage bulges so much that people driving by in cars slow down or stop to take a look. At first I thought it was sexual harassment, but I've learned to accept it. It's sort of like when royalty would drive by in England. Anyways, it tends to cause traffic jams so some people get mad, but the cool thing is that it keeps me in a constant state of laydom.
94Sep30 10:58 pm from Murray Headroom And I suppose to be accurate, we should spell it "teats." Big "teats." 94Oct01 7:27 am from Swagman Technically speaking the teat is only the nipple, the rest is considered to be bazoomba.
94Oct06 6:34 pm from Colin Campbell I used to get that momentary-blackout when I stood up rapidly, but it hasn't happened to me since my teens. I had low blood pressure then and now it's moderately high, so I guess that's the reason. I don't know what causes high blood pressure...mine is like 130/88. For a couple nights after I came out of surgery in June I was hooked to these monitor devices and I'd wake up and I could see my pulse and blood pressure on a screen. They must have had me on blood pressure drugs or something because I kept seeing 115/70... I have a brother and a sister who are twins. She drinks and smokes heavily and it's nono wonder that at age 41 she's got emphysema and is on medication to fight high blood pressure. The funny thing is that her twin has never had a drink or a smoke in his life and he has sky-high blood pressure, too. My other two brothers: one doesn't smoke but is an alcoholic and is 60 pounds overwegiht, and he has very high blood pressure--I keep expecting him to pop. The other one is skinny from smoking so much and he drinks like a fish, too, but his blood pressure is very low. On the other hand, he has a sky-high cholesterol count. I think the best thing is to just ignore all these measurements. 94Oct06 9:37 pm from Swagman My blood pressure is 140/90, my cholesterol count is 173, my weight is 190, my IQ is 147, my age is 42, my typing speed is 45, I have 4 sisters, I have 3 children, I row 2 miles in 20 minutes, in high school I pole vaulted 10' 6", my fastest mile run is 6 minutes, I did one marathon in 5 hours 45 minutes, I sailed a small boat to Hawaii in 19 days 9 hours, I have $113 dollars in my wallet, I have my wake to music alarm set at 05:30 am, when I came to Santa Barbara I was 20 years old and it was my 20th relocation, I have 2 phone lines, I work in a company of 300 people, I set up a Novell with 65 stations, I manage a T-1 circuit with 21 voice and 2 data channels, not to mention 11 ground start trunks and 10 loop start private lines, I own 2 cars, 2 boats, and 2 guitars, there are 4 tool boxes in my garage, I can see 7 electric lights on from where I sit, I ate 3 hamburgers for dinner (and 1 piece of strwberry rhubarb pie), I've written 8 poems since the end of July, I have 5 pairs of glasses (but only can see from 1), I have 1 lawn mower (but never use it), I have 40 messages saved in my voice mail at work, I have 2 Meteor Party posters on my wall next to 3 calendars, and I'm tired of counting now. Thanks. 94Oct07 12:06 am from JSK I have one (1) case of eye strain from poring through that.
94Oct06 4:42 am from Murray Headroom I was at a restaurant with my family a coupla weeks back, and the waitress (who was very attractive and I considered going back there to ask her out) gave us some mints with our bill. Silly me, I thought they were mints. They were little balls of concentrated sugar. I popped one in my mouth, innocently enough, and my gums receded beyond my mandibular bones and my teeth shook. I could feel the skin on my face tighten until I summoned the cajones to spit the offensive monster out of my wounded oralfice. My family thought I was weird. 94Oct06 6:36 am from Swagman Hmm, oralfice. New word. Then there must be an optifice, analfice, auralfice, nasalfice, and pissifice. 94Oct06 2:15 pm from Luminary Coremaster If you have a hole in your psychic energy, is that an aurafice? 94Oct06 5:56 pm from Swagman If your thing is folding paper, it could be an origamifice. 94Oct06 6:35 pm from Colin Campbell If it was a giant door in a giant building it could be an edifice rex.
94Sep19 5:39 am from MikeSwanson I remember when I was young and we used to have a good (goode) Olde Fashioned Zeylan Christmas. Chestnuts roasting over an open fire, savage invective nipping at your nose.
94Oct02 11:03 pm from Amarantheus @ Swagland BBS _ Java, Indonesia Walking around northern renaissance faire today I was infinitely amused by a group of customers in full star trek costume, muttering "Computer, end program" to themselves every few minutes..
94Oct11 10:40 pm from Murray Headroom October 11, 1994 Dear Trojan Container Company: Though I am not sexually active, if I were I would very likely utilize your brand of condom due to your sterling reputation and wide marketplace influence. I have used your product in the past with grand success, and I feel you provide a very valuable tool for today's society. (I do find, however, that retailers in my area do not supply Trojan brand products which include particular embellishments I find on certain imported competitors; also, the rise in prices over the last few years is dismaying, though I understand the market factors which prompt it.) Gratuitous compliments are not my impetus for writing, however. I was recently struck by an idea which perhaps you will find of interest. It was at the supermarket where I heard the old hit song "Love Is The Answer" by England Dan and John Ford Coley. I hummed along with this popular standard and, being in a light-hearted mood, altered some of the lyrics when I reached the bridge. The song originally goes something like this: "When you're down and out, love one another, When your hope's run out, love one another, When you need a friend, love one another, When you're near the end, love one another..." And so on, proclaiming that Love is the answer. In my version, I substituted the phrase "with a rubber," for "one another." The meter is the same, but the song takes on a whole new, poignant meaning: "When you feel afraid, love with a rubber, When you've lost your way, love with a rubber, When you're all alone, love with a rubber, When you're far from home, love with a rubber, A rubber's the answer." I am forced to wonder whether the copywriters in Trojan's marketing division have considered contacting the publisher of the tune in order to secure the rights for advertisement. I think this would be a very clever, and catchy, method to bring a once taboo subject into polite society. Not only does it promote responsibility, but associate's Trojan's name with that dedication to public safety. I thought I would share this with your company. I hope you agree about the potential in this idea. I am not asking for any particular reward, simply a safer, saner world in which we can all live. Sincerely, xx PS: At that same supermarket, I noticed them using paper bags which were marked as products of a company called Trojan. Do you make paper bags as well as latex products?
94Oct14 12:27 am from Mordrak i went and took the personality test at the Dianetics place on state. They said the computer said that my personality was a random graph, ungraphable. then the guy accused me of not taking the test seriously and not understanding all the questions. bleah.
94Oct23 9:11 pm from Amarantheus I met one of the Residents today. His wife works at Skellington productions in San Francisco. I think a little part of the universe collapsed. 94Oct23 10:33 pm from Luminary Coremaster What? WHAT?! WHAT?!??!?! YOU MET ONE OF THE RESIDENTS?!?!?!? OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!! YOU MET ONE OF THE RESIDENTS?????? YOU MET ONE OF THE RESIDENTS??!?!?! TELL ME EVERY DETAIL!!! PLEASE!!! What did he look like? What did he act like? What happened when you met him??? YOU ARE MY HERO!!!
94Nov09 7:53 am from BOXHEAD I've got the Piss Shiver!
94Nov13 7:14 am from Swagman Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat. 94Nov13 10:14 am from Luminary Coremaster Bullwinkle, that's not a rabbit! 94Nov13 12:09 pm from Jabba It's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on! 94Nov13 1:08 pm from Psyche Oops, wrong hat. 94Nov13 2:42 pm from Swagman But Bulwinkle, that trick never works... 94Nov13 3:48 pm from Lack of Sleep But it feels good, Rocky. 94Nov13 6:44 pm from Swagman But Bulwinkle, if it feels that good then it's probably something that will make you go insane or else get you arrested in Oklahoma or Tennessee. 94Nov13 7:37 pm from Luminary Coremaster Oh, Rocky, my antlers explode with delight! 94Nov13 10:21 pm from Murray Headroom Hey Rocky, let's wrap you up in masking tape and you can crawl up my ass!
94Nov14 11:43 pm from Seanette Pierce Psyche, dear, perhaps some Midol is in order.
94Nov29 6:33 pm from INFINITE RETRY in the 90's paranoia is a survival skill. and EVERYTHING i have posted has a clear, factual, easily verifiable basis, except maybe that bit about Clinton being a blood relative and lineal descendent of Adolph Hitler. because of the uncertainty of Clinton's paternal parentage, some speculation was involved in that, but the other evidence, especially the neurochemistry and historical data is readily discernable.
94Nov29 5:54 pm from colin campbell @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara God is male, because he sticks his thing in and erupts and that's how creation gets started. 94Nov29 7:59 pm Be My Neighbor from Null @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara God has the biggest penis in the universe.
94Dec14 3:04 pm from Salary's Enemy Newstyle, it's amazing that someone who possesses as much knowledge as you profess to doesn't know how to punctuate a contraction. Yes, you have contemplated the sublime truths of God's eternal essence; now how about developing some 3rd-grade English slills? 94Dec15 from Zeylan Hey nEwStYlE, there's a difference between a typo and not knowing the difference between "your" and "you're". If you had spelled it "you'bf", then maybe it'd pass as a typo. Admit it, you don't speak English.
94Dec26 7:26 pm from Psyche @ Swagland BBS _ Frog Creek, Dakota The Swan Princess sucked. And cats smell bad and have fleas.
94Dec28 8:31 pm from INFINITE RETRY @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara i finally got one of those strange solicitation calls from the News-Press. phone rings, i answer, the first thing he says is "So, are you getting your morning News-Press okay?" I say, "No, i don't take the paper." (you would think he would have an accurate list of subscribers, wouldn't you?) Then he says, "Well, we have a special, if you sign up now -- " I interrupt him and say "I'm not interested at all, I stopped taking the News Press when it was bought out by the New York Times and became a Marxist comic strip." Then he says, and i give him credit for trying, "Okay, but did you know that 85 percent of our subscribers say that the primary reason they take the paper is NOT FOR THE EDITORIAL CONTENT BUT FOR THE LOCAL ADVERTISING CONTENT, especially the grocery store flyers with coupons and other discount merchandise opportunities?" I said "No, I didn't know that, i don't need that junk, thanks anyway, goodbye." Here is what i find notable about this incident. They are trying to sell a newspaper and basically admitting that the textual content is of little concern to them, the news is just a thin premise for delivering grocery store coupons to your door. I also think that the fact the sales guy had this pre-cut response to my expression of distaste for their slanted news means that OTHER PEOPLE must be saying the same type of thing to them and they have cooked up this pathetic "grocery coupon" line as a response to frequent objections to the content of the paper.
95Jan04 5:03 am White Powder from Milla @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara macaroni and cheese is pretty good. I wanted to try that new white cheddar kind. Hey MOM Get me some white cheddar macaroni and chese. YEAH. 95Jan04 5:17 pm from Hobgoblin @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara I'm not going to shut up. I refuse. You can't tell me what to do! If you want me to shut up, I won't! I'll only shut up when I want to shut up! And I don't want to shut up. This is not a fascist regime. I can talk when, where, and most importanly however I want. I demand and end! You can't boss me around. I am my own person; I live my life for me, of me, and because of me. I belong to myself and nobody else! I AM FREE. I do not need your presmission, leave, allowance, sufferance, tolerance, toleration, connivance, liberty, law, license, concession, grance, indulgence, favor, dispenation, exemption, release, authorization, accordance, OR admission to speak! I have scop! I can do what I like, be at large, feel at home, and stand on my rights. I am independent, at large, loost, scot-free, unconstrained, unconfined, and unchecked! I am unhindered, unobstructed, uncontrolled, ungoverned, unchained, unshackled, unfettered, unbridled, uncurbed, unmuzzled, or unvanquished! You are not the master and I am not the slave! I am not Kerberus the dog from the junior high Latin texts, and you are not my ancient Roman master; rather, I am the master and I am the slave. In this manner, I control my own actions. I live in the United States of America, and this glorious country was founded and based on the freedom to speak! Dare you edny my of my RIGHTS granted to me by the First Amendment of the United States of America? Are you a devil-empowered censor? Are you related to Tipper Gore? I DEFY YOU. I DEFY YOUR ATTEMPS TO DEHUMANIZE ME. I REJECT YOUR FEEBLE COMMAND THAT I SHUT UP. I WILL NOT. AND I WILL NEVER. You will have to surgically remove my lower jaw, cut out my tongue, chop off my fingers, cut all my hair, severe my vocal cords, AND break my spine to deny me of my human right of self expression! You can NOT win. I am my own God. Famous philosophers realized that human beings have natural rights, one of them being liberty. Because I am a human being, I have natural rights, and guess what that means? I HAVE LIBERTY! You cannot command me! I am not your tetherball on a rope. I am not your pet. I am not your fish in a glass tank. I am not your belonging. So pbtpbttbptbptbptptb. 95Jan04 5:41 pm from Sicko @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara Now look what you did. 95Jan04 9:01 pm from Hobgoblin @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara Wassat? 95Jan04 10:38 pm from Seanette Pierce @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara Hope you feel better now that you have all that out of your system, Hobgoblin. 95Jan05 8:00 pm from Hobgoblin @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara Qwerty. ASDF! 95Jan04 11:10 pm from Murray Headroom @ Swagland BBS _ Frog Creek, Dakota I wish I could have cheese with my pot. 95Jan05 1:29 am from Luminary Coremaster @ Swagland BBS _ Frog Creek, Dakota Marajuana and Cheese? Little Girl: "No, it's Cheese and Marajuana!" 95Jan05 6:11 pm from Norbus @ Swagland BBS _ Frog Creek, Dakota Oh my God... You mean people on here do drugs? I'm shocked... 95Jan05 7:14 pm from Swagman @ Swagland BBS _ Frog Creek, Dakota Excedrin, Sudafed, Amoxcillin... 95Jan06 12:19 am from Colin Campbell @ Swagland BBS _ Frog Creek, Dakota So far in my life I've only done weed, coke, smack, acid, speed, ecstacy, booze and cigarettes. 95Jan06 1:07 am from brian @ Swagland BBS _ Frog Creek, Dakota Weeds are bad. They take room from plants.
Lobby> Terminate Quit-also confirm? (Y/N): y Zeylan logged out
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