02-Apr-91 23:02 From colin campbell
I've only had one message deleted from Bowhead that I know of, and that was
in the anonymous room. I'm just too bland to be noticed, I guess.
Things are slow on all the boards I go to. Bowhead is down, or at least not
answering. I'm starting to feel as though I've used up my interest in BBSing.
I've blabbed about what I felt like blabbing about, and it has been a
catharsis. The electronic confessional.
But now I'm blabbed out. I'm not interested in the discussions on religion
and abortion. When I started BBSing, I was very surprised at the high
percentage of messages discussing religion. But then I thought back to the
biggest technological innovation of the millenium, and remembered that the
first thing it was used for was to print the Gutenberg Bible.
Religion is a vicious meme, a mental virus that now can transmit and vector
itself through computer disks and telephone lines.
I'm also tired of the artificial personalities that some users try to
plaster all over the place. The whole point seems to be to lull other
users into falling for it. It's an anti-communication device that makes
people suspicious and keeps them wary. I know Swagman and Diablo
personally, for instance, so I know who I'm talking to when I respond to
their messages. I've never met Fr. Higgens, but I have faith that he
exists.
I went into BBSing thinking it would be a place where we could share
information. Maybe it's different on things like Compuserve.
02-Apr-91 23:08 From Doug Hanley
Colin, you have always had interesting info to share and it has been
appreciated.
What can be done to liven up the Telecom scene in Santa Barbara?
03-Apr-91 1:31 From Diablo
As Colin said, there is a lull now in the boards, so that makes it kinda
boring. However, you can't MAKE it interesting. On the talk boards, people
will talk about what they want to. You can try to push a converstation one way
or another, or start a new one. But, unless you start a bitter name calling
battle about abortion, or which computer is "best", only a few people are going
to participate. It always amazes me to go thru Bowhead, see one or two new
messages in a few rooms, then see 14 new messages in the Faith Bashing section
where the participants have been calling each other close minded assholes for
the last few weeks.
BTW Colin, what kind of information do you want to share?
03-Apr-91 8:33 From Bruce Baugh
The only long-term cure is talkative new users. The "old" BBS community is
splitting up and heading off in different directions (even if people aren't
moving - see Colin's message, above).
I know I've been spending a lot more time on CCH and N23 lately, because of the
networks. It doesn't matter if there is only one person in a town interested
in, for example, the novels of Charles Williams or the metaphorical uses of
chaos theory or the influences on Michael P. Kube-McDowell, because the towns
are electronically close together.
Poisoned local atmosphere is part of the problem, of course. Too many people
are carrying around grudges and absolutely bent on making the target's life
unpleasant. Not much can be done from outside about that.
Colin, whaddya wanna swap information about? Information of the same sorts, or
trades, like, you tell me about why black holes may be in theoretical trouble
and I tell you how responsible Eisenhower really was for the U-2 incident?
03-Apr-91 8:52 From Diablo
I thought I was one of the new talkative users. After all, I've only been
around for about 1 1/2 years. There are people here who've been bbs'ers when a
300 baud modem was state of the art.
07-Apr-91 9:44 From Zepp
All the "new" users should hold on to Colin's message for a couple of years and
read it then, and see if they don't share quite a bit of Colin's feelings. If
you are very lucky, you might vaguely recall fake accounts...
By the time I put Ren up, I had figured out that the big problems in
telecom weren't cussing or even repetition: the two biggest problems were
getting people to have faith in the discussions to be populated by other people
speaking their minds and not simply baiting everyone, and allowing unpopular
voices to be heard. So I did my best to keep bogus accounts to a minimum (with
mixed sucess) and had "Treat others with respect" as the board rule. The
latter was a sucess, and so was Ren.
Up here in Siskiyou county, the telecom community is tiny. Right now
Ren is the only conversation board for 50 miles around, and for all of that, I
have 10 active local users. ("Local" doesn't include McCloud, which has a 60%
unemployment rate).
Padre and Colin and some of the other long-time users would be reminded
a bit of Sanctuary if they called Ren right now--there are a lot of one-liners
and a lot of give-and-take among the users. But the TONE is different--these
people mostly know one another, and some of the nastiness and outright cruelty
that used to occasionally stain Sanctuary just isn't there. Religion and
politics get disscussed, but most of the rooms consist of conversations on a
more personal level. Anecdotes, rather than diatribes. I've been running the
board open-access from the day I got up here, and haven't had a single problem.
No rules on profanity--this is the Siskiyou. People can either accept the
board as it is, or they leave it alone.
Colin, I wish you could afford to keep an eye on Ren: the people up
here are doing a good job of demonstrating that local telecom doesn't have to
consist of Big Issues and Little Angers: it can be what it was supposed to be
from the start: people talking to other people. And if some call that
"bland", then fine: I'll take the bland honesty and friendship I find here
over staged theatre of the mind anyday...
Mon, 08 Apr 91 14:39:39 from: logos (Logos Octafish)
I'm really glad Digital Dungeon is finally going down; the sysop
entirely lost interest in it some time ago, and so for a few months now
I've been witnessing its slow deterioration, which has been sort of
pathetic as I've put some time in to the system myself, historically.
Aside from the instance of Zepp, the sysops of boards have never
been the ones primarily responsible for the success of their boards. In
many cases, though, they have been responsible for the failures. It
would be interesting if the real creative elements -- the Colin
Campbells, the Sherlock Holmeses, etc. -- were to begin running boards,
rather than just the mediocre hacks who vacillate between conservative
economic liberty explanations for their sysophood, or pure martyrdom.
But now we're on the threshold of something new. Someone who's been
connected for some time with the FFS, and who did some wonderful
experiments with sysoping on the Enterprize, is running his own board.
Does it take a conversion to make an FFSer?
91Apr27 6:22 pm from colin campbell
REN was the board, Renaissance, that Zepp sysoped. A clique of young
vandals took pleasure in disrupting Zepp's board any way they could, and Zepp
responded by banning them. The vandals squawked and bleated about it on other
boards, and Zepp called them "Facists for Free Speech," and they shouted back
and forth at each other for a year or so. One day I made up a batch of
official membership cards for the FFS and mailed them to people who would get
a chuckle out of it.
Zepp and the FFSers are evil twins of each other, which none of them will
admit, but if it weren't true the issue would have long since faded.
91Apr27 9:28 pm from Island Girl
Sort of like "Hobbs and the Evil Xerox twin of himself."
91Apr27 6:38 pm from colin campbell
Boards have their up days and down days. Last summer, Digital Dungeon had
about three weeks of peak--an intense shared intoxication with the board and
the way the conversations were going. Then the biffer squashed it flat, and
the momentum could not be regained.
I get really mad at biffers. If I ever meet Jeff Austin in public I might
break his jaw. When a board gets really rolling, it is a shared creative
event, it's my baby along with the other users', and to have it tromped on
just for the glory of wrecking somebody else's fun....grrr.
91Apr27 7:51 pm from Diablo
Well Voodo, apparently we're not going to have a nice, non-flaming
discussion.
1) I never accused the "FFS" of anything. I don't know what it stands for,
and I don't care. I never even mentioned any particular person or group in
this thread. I don't give a shit about the past "Ren vs FFS" battles.
Accusing me of trashing the FFS is ridiculous because I NEVER MENTIONED THE
GROUP, NOR ANY OF ITS SUPPOSED MEMBERS in my messages.
You really ought to chill out, and not assume that every message posted is a
personal attack against you, or the FFS.
2) What I did say is that sysops should have the right to maintain control
over their systems if they so choose. This is an inherent right; its their
computer, they can do whatever the hell they want with it.
3) I don't care what your goals are, but your means really suck. In another
thread, you accused me of dehumanizing you instead of rebuking your argument
(a message in which you personally attacked me at least 3 times). In your last
message you accused me of slander, vindictiveness and the defamation of a
group I'VE NEVER EVEN MENTIONED. I was talking about the rights of a sysop
(the guy who owns the machine a bbs is run on) and you start talking about how
I've slandered the FFS. The logic in your responce escapes me.
I'm not out to get you, or anybody. I enjoy debate with people because it
enlarges my understanding of things; everyone has a different viewpoint, and
it educational to look at things from the other person's view point. At some
point in the future, I'd like to be able to have some frank debates with you;
you're obviously very intelligent and good at debate. However, you must have
me confused with someone else, because you seem to over react.
91Jul25 8:05 pm from Kudos
When I got my modem and some BBS system phone numbers I was hoping I would be
ble to find some knowledgeable, helpful company in this dizzying journey
towards technological perfection (or annihilation). I was hoping BBS systems
would, like college never could, introduce me to true intellectual and
spiritual peers. But what did I find? A bunch of sniggering, loud-mouthed,
foul-mouthed adolescent and wannaba adolescent morons who are about as
constructive with their time as sulfuric acid. This BBS system can not even
realistically claim fame from being "the last refuge of scoundrels," since
it's just one more of the uncountable places were scoundrels are having a
cross between a perpetual orgasmic heyday and a bar room brawl. I repeat:
everyone here, with the few exceptions of math blaster, Boxhead, Swagman, and
maybe Broken Bones and Bliss Ragsdale, everyone here has an attitude problem
within an ego problem within a personality problem.
It is not in my nature to just up and leave when I find a problem very
much needing repair, but in this case I am overwhelmed with a sense of
futility. You'll all just have to sort these problems out yourselves, or
kill each other trying to ignore them.
I hope a few of you realize the wisdom in my flight and follow me out of
this stupid hobby. I don't want to seem to in praise of myself, but the need
for me to criticize all you fools so harshly will make anything I'm neutral or
slightly positive about seem like a celebration. And why shouldn't I
celebrate? I'm about to leave, and never come back!
So long Jeff, Diablo, Jake, MM (ugh!), Colin, Diet, Sicko, etc., etc.
91Jul25 8:33 pm from colin campbell
I too had grandiose inchoate expectations when I began BBSing. I confess to
being a wannabe adolescent. Disappointingly, all I've gotten out of BBSing is
many thousand dollars worth of freelance employment and the friendship of a
dozen warm and witty humans.
We're all going to miss Khaos, aren't we. If only he'd told us his feelings
sooner. One message, and then goodbye...it hardly gives us time to react.
91Jul25 9:14 pm from HOOKLA
I agree, Colin, I guess we are in some ways 'wannabe adolescents',
clinging to our youth like some elaborate security blanket. But that, in
itself, is not so bad.
Personally, I enjoy the quick wit, and sometimes even the slow witted
humor. People like him may consider us heathens, pagans, or what-not, but
then again, what is so wrong about human sacrifice?
Years ago, I started BBSing just to see what it was like. I found an entire
society based on anonymity and free expression. My varying schedule often
made it difficult to keep in the crowd, but I found some worthy
conversations. I found people who like to encourage, and people who
encouraged the belittling of new users. I found the environment stimulating.
Now, at my fourth year at UCSB, I still find the conversations fulfilling.
Maybe not as good as they once were, but fulfilling, nonetheless. I never
once thought of BBSing as stupid, as the interaction of others is important to
me. When all my friends have fled to other places, BBSing will still be
there for me.
91Jul25 10:11 pm from jeffrey mcmanus
When I feel like telling people exactly what I think, I'm often tempted to
construct a fake account to do so. But somehow I never do and I just keep on
speaking my mind anyway. You'll all pardon me if I speak my mind.
91Jul25 10:43 pm from Mirror Man
Gee, what a place to call and get judged.
91Jul25 11:16 pm from JSK
I never expected more out of BBSing than file transfers & resume uploads. I
never found any place to put my resume. I had a lot of fun downloading Atari
files. (I refer to the early days, when Ataris were still around.)
I understand internet is cluttered with lots of flames and garbage messages,
just like here. I keep thinking there has to be some kind of AI program that
could be written to filter out junk. Repetition would be easy to spot.
Messages from black-listed users. Form feeds, bells, vertical tabs.
91Jul25 11:49 pm from BOXHEAD
PRINT CHR$(7) 7 7 7 7 7 9 9 9 9 7 9 7 97 9 7 9 7 !! It looks like a wanna be
adolescent also. I am ashamed.
91Jul26 12:18 am from Death Penguin
I have to agree with Kudos. I won't miss him, but I agree with him.
91Jul26 6:56 am from Swagman
Oh, so many times, I look at The Dragon's computer sitting on the
table with the monitor all dark in it's screen-saving mode and wonder
why I spent the money on such a frivolous endeavor.
In order to put up the Dragon, I took the money I had been saving
up for my taxes and impulse bought the computer, damn those taxes.
Then dealing with GTE for three weeks of hassles putting in a phone
line was the low point of all this, GTE is a labrynth of faceless
telephone voices reading from canned scripts until you get pissed
enough to raise enough stink to allow you to speak to the one
"supervisor" who knows what's going on but is kind enough to expain
that they are absolutely powerless to exert control over any of it.
The Dragon went up for the first time on April Fool's Day, an ap-
propriate date you'll agree.
Now having gone through all that to get here in order to have an
occasional user rant that they don't like it here and that they're
leaving fills me with sadness unimaginable. "Oh please don't go," I
should say, but I can't. "Oh, please hang around an explore linguistic
semantics with us," I could say that too, but why? Yes, why should I
say any of that when I can say, "Piss off, go away, don't come back,
don't let the door hit you in the ass when you leave, rip out your own
entrails and leave them on the exit footpath as a reminder to us that
you've left."
91Jul26 10:44 am from BOXHEAD
Beautiful. Just Beautiful.
91Jul26 11:07 am from Diablo
Gee, I nearly made top billing of obnoxious users. Maybe I should flame more
people to nudge Jeffrey out of the top spot.
91Jul26 4:05 pm from Uncle Jake
A few weeks ago Bliss Ragsdale disagreed with my desire to make telecom a more
wide open forum; she said she liked it this small -- with only a couple dozen
people. True, there would be some immediate drawbacks if everyone who bought
a modem in SB were informed about the BBS pool; things would probably get very
crowded, and telecom might finally end up becoming CIVILIZED. But I think the
advantages contingent upon a telecom expansion would be worth it. Whenever a
couple of new users appear, I think to myself, Hey, maybe people are finally
learning about our local BBS scene! But then, almost invariably, the users
fade out as quickly as they appeared, and it makes me sad. (Sniff.)
91Jul26 4:33 pm from Uncle Jake
Colin talked a while ago about some contest for deciding a "real Santa
Barbaran." What about a real BBSer? I think some of us would have to admit
to being real BBSers. I've been calling for more than four years. Heck, I
remember when ALL of you people first showed up. The odd thing is, I
wouldn't've been able to tell that some of you would stick around. I was
certain Colin would leave; he wrote an absolutely mournful, very
sincere-sounding complaint about the ignored, abused potential of BBSes on an
old Linstruth board called the Completion Backward Principle. Swagman and
Island Girl were too good to be true when they first appeared on Digital
Dungeon before Todd Howitt wrecked it (er, took it over). The addition of
Gaiasys was interesting, but Gaiasys has almost nothing to do with what I used
to see as mainstream telecom (boards under the Zepp tradition, the Blaylock
board, and the DD boards) -- or course "mainstream telecom" keeps changing.
In 1987 the hippest boards were the Message Factory -- run on a Commodore
computer -- Compucations, which was Citadel (amazing how little Citadel has
changed) -- and the Enterprize, which was actually a fun, challenging board
back then before its long succession of obnoxious changes. Back then telecom
felt much larger to me and much had much more mystery. There were people who
I felt sort of awed by. Now I think everyone's either a pathetic sham, an
imbecile, a dolt, a slightly nice guy, or a very nice guy. That's more or
less all.
BBS therapy?
91Jul26 7:28 pm from Diablo
I guess the bbs world looks big to people when the first come on (besides that
it actually is big, if you take long distance and pay services into account)
is that its essentially a new world to discover and explore before they find
their place in it.
BBS therapy? Hozabout BBS anonymous. "I used to be a three call a day
bbser. I'd call every board on my list (there are about 12) every day about
three times. I'd even log on under different names and have conversations and
arguments with myself...."
30-Jul-91 18:46 From Swagman
Ding dang, just last week Pee-Wee was simply an upstanding citizen and this
week he's a hardened criminal.
30-Jul-91 20:06 From sudden IMPACT
No, I really don't think Pee-wee will simply fade away because of this; if
anything, he'll increase in stature. Cult heroes don't fade away because of
downfalls: look at Marilyn Monroe, James Dean, Elvis Presley, etc.
A San Francisco-based group has already rallied to Pee-Wee's defense.
They're threatening to boycott all sponsors of CBS programming until the
network reinstates the playhouse, and they're sending red bow ties to the
network in protest.
30-Jul-91 21:04 From colin campbell
Swags, I think you meant hardoned criminal, right?
31-Jul-91 0:04 From Diablo
From what I hear, his show was supposed to be very good (I couldn't stand the
little snipets I saw of it; but then again, I can't stand any Saturday morning
type stuff). However, does his personal life really affect the quality of his
professional work?
31-Jul-91 6:40 From Swagman
Exactly Colin.
31-Jul-91 11:29 From Vaughn Fletcher
Let us not forget that people are innocent until proven guilty. It may be that
the police are trying to close down that theater with typical nazi pig stunts.
The cops may have shot themselves in the foot by arresting someone that has the
money to defend himself, and then forcing him to by making all this publicity.
(Hardoned criminal : ) I liked that.)
91Oct03 10:27 pm from Voodoo Smart Bomb
Once again, it's time for the SB telecomm community's Annual Golden Biff
Awards! This year we've streamlined the contest down to ten categories,
keeping several from last year identical, while adding some new ones to match
the colorful changes recent BBS history has brought.
Before listing the categories, the Golden Biff Q will be on Saturday,
Novermber 2. It will begin at 7:32 pm at Rusty's in Goleta. Ballots will
be collected starting Monday, October 21. Obviously everyone has plenty of
time to vote. The deadline for voting is Thursday the 31st -- Halloween -- at
midnight. Votes should be sent to Swagman either on the Dragon (562-8205) or
on any other board where he has an account. Users are all urged to vote, even
if they are new to telecom. If you don't know who to recommend for a
particular category, then just skip that category and provide your opinions on
the other ones.
Here are the ten categories. Thanks to Colin, Swagman, and Bliss Ragsdale
for their input on the categories this year.
1) Best BBS
2) Most controversial user
3) Best handle
4) Most humorous user
5) Best looking user
6) Most spectacular misspeller
7) Best real female user
8) User you most appreciate
9) User most sensitive about his hat
10) User most in dire need of a blowjob
If any of them are at all vague to you, rely on your own best
interpretation. Think it over, and plan to be at the Q!
-Aidan
91Nov01 from Swagman to Colin Campbell
Here's the results:
1991 Golden Biff Voting Tabulation of 15 voting users:
Mysteer WeirD, Scattered, Scott Revlin, Bliss Ragsdale,
Hotblack Desiato, Ghoast, Ttrgrmmtn, Diablo, Adept, Wanderlust,
Ma Beagle's Poison, Aidan Butler, Colin Campbell, PJ Wolf,
Swagman, Island Girl, Math Blaster
1) Best BBS
**** The Dragon ///////////
The Enterprize /
Sbanet /
Fat Aggies /
Gaiasys /
Haunted Manor //
2) Most controversial user
Jeff Peterson /
**** Sick-O Pervert ////////
Aidan Butler //
Vaughn Fletcher /
Misha /
Al Coholic //
3) Best handle
Death Penguin //
Ma Beagle's Poison /
Lxix /
**** Diet Rapture /////
Ttrgrmmtn //
Toy Soldier /
Adept /
Voodoo Slide Rule /
Mysteer WeirD /
Voodoo Smart Bomb /
4) Most humorous user
Sick-O /
Bill the Cat ////
**** Swagman /////
Electronic Rebel /
Colin Campbell /
Bowman //
5) Best looking user
Buccaneer /
Bliss Ragsdale //
Broken Bones /
Aidan Butler /
Swiss Dove /
A real one /
Ttrgrmmtn /
Rosminah /
Ghoast /
Scattered /
Bob Blaylock /
**** Island Girl ///
6) Most spectacular misspeller
Hermit (McCloud user) /
**** Doug Hanley ////
Broken Bones //
Matrix (Tom Eby) //
Bill the Cat //
Shamrock /
Scott Revlin /
Sick-O /
7) Best real female user
**** Bliss Ragsdale ///////
Voice of Gazette /
Misha /
Island Girl //
Debi Howell /
Shamrock //
The Spectress /
8) User you most appreciate
**** Colin Campbell ////////
Math Blaster /
Swagman /
Diablo /
Hotblack Desiato /
Doug Hanley /
Big Lou //
Blister Rags /
9) User most sensitive about his hat
**** Bob Blaylock /////////////
Bruce Baugh /
Barry Brown /
Adept /
10) User most in dire need of a blowjob
Aidan Butler ////
Mysteer WeirD ///
**** Diablo /////
Random /
Bob Blaylock //
Scott Revlin /
The Sacred X /
----------------------------------------------------
Write in Categories:
**** Most Prolific User
Colin Campbell /
The Best Sysop
Swagman //
User most likely to and capable of stuffing the ballot box:
Aidan Butler /
User with the least convincing fake accounts:
Aidan Butler /
**** User most likely to expound on shit
he really knows nothing about:
Sick-O Pervert /
**** User who knows basically everything about electronics:
Bob Blaylock /
Users not appreciated nearly enough
Colin Campbell /
Sherlock Holmes /
**** Youngest User in Telecom
Math Blaster ///
-------------------------------------------------------------------
"****" signifies my opinion on which items need Award Certificates,
but since you are the Master Creative here in this portion, you can do what
you wish...
See you Saturday Night...
20-Dec-91 7:02 From Swagman
I don't think that the "biff" is such an honored entity so much as it is a
phenomena exclusive to telecom for its existence and as such evokes an
image applicable only to telecom. And so it was that the nefarious Zepp
Jamieson was leaving SB Telecom and was having an innocent good-bye party on
Sunday and some telecom wag created and heavily promoted the first "Golden
Biff Awards" to be held on Saturday. In this way, Aidan Butler (close relative
to the original "biff" artist) gave Zepp one last biff before he left town.
The Dragon in its role as successor to the Digital Dungeon, carried on the
Golden Biff tradition in sponsoring the 2nd Annual Golden Biff Awards this year
but the true power behind the Golden Biff effort is Colin Campbell, without
whom the Golden Biff would have no existence. Colin designed and printed the
awared certificates for two years now. His energy and enthusiasm for telecom
is legendary. He has designed and printed at no cost, four telecom literary
magazines: Cosmic Charley vol.1, Cosmic Charley vol.2, The Merry Widow, and The
Dragon's Breath. Also Colin designed and printed the Official Fascists for
Free Speech membership cards.
Thanks Colin! Thanks Aidan! Thanks Zepp! Thanks for the memories. (sniff,
sniff -- enough of this polly-anna nostalgia)
92May22 11:07 pm from colin
I guess the decline in the local boards is parallel to the decline in the
economy. BBSing has still made zero effect in the real economic world. The
market is too small. BBSing is still a hobbyist sport, and dedicated
spoilsports can intrude and wreck it for everyone. The users like Farmer's
Glory are similar to a virus. They inject themselves into a bulletin board
whenever they can and then swamp legitimate messages with repetitive
non-sequiturs until all other conversation is silenced. Each silenced and
destroyed BBS is another feather in the cap of these skunks
23-May-92 7:24 From Swagman
Well, once again the FFS reigns supreme.
23-May-92 8:41 From Zepp
Sorry to hear the Dragon's going down. Swag, you're a class act, and I think
95% of the users down your way know it.
23-May-92 7:24 From Swagman
Hey! Come one, come all to the Dead Dragon Vollyball -Q at Stow Grove Park at
noon today. Hear the gruesome details of the last moments of the Dragon's life
and hear the tape recording of the the hideous sound of anguish released by the
Dragon when the "Del *.*" was punched. Hear for yourself the squishy munching
sound made when the Dragon's hard drive was reformatted.
Come pick up a copy of the Dragon's Breath.
Come answer the challenge of the Dead Dragon BBSers to rule the world of
Vollyball...
23-May-92 12:29 From Skull Fracture
The FFS is fucking bullshit and nobody cares but the two people that pretend
they are members.
23-May-92 13:29 From Johnston Kinds
I think the FFS was really before your time, Skull Fracture. Whatever you say
about their tactics, etc., they brought about real debates on imporant issues
that are still quite relevant today. Whether there were any material
accomplishments is still for objective BBS historians (not that there are any)
to evaluate. But at the very least, they brought up subjects some people
wanted to keep locked away in dusty corners, and they created a pitch of
controversial energy that has rarely -- if ever -- been matched on local
systems. It's the very nature of controversy that some people are not going to
want it to exist.
As for there being two members, that's questionable. Colin Campbell
distributed _lots_ of membership cards (not that that gave a reliable count),
but it's certain that these people were "members": Misha, myself, Larry Cohen,
Sherlock Holmes, and later, Lazarus and Fubar/Black Rose/Tapp. So on this
system currently there are at least three former members.
At any rate, it's rash to so loudly censure something you don't know
about.
02Jun25 8:25 pm from Colin Campbell
Swagland, the west coast alternative to Graceland. This roped-off area here
is where the Swagman wriggled like a lizard on his belly. This shrine here is
the sanctified burial cask of The New Dragon.
92Aug14 1:47 am from Jesus Fuckin Christ
Incidentally, here again are the categories for this year's Golden Biff Awards.
Have I mentioned that everyone should vote?
1) Most Creative User
2) Best Message Writer
3) User You'd Most Like to Spend a Week Alone With
4) User Most Likely to Go Insane
5) Most Humorous User
6) User Who's Suffered the Most
7) Most Controversial User
8) Best Handle
9) User Who'd Make the Best U.S. President
10) Most Stalinistic Sysop
92Aug25 10:54 pm from No-Show to Colin Campbell
OK, here are the winners for the Golden Biff Awards. I warned you there were
lots of ties! This is really going to either look utterly stupid, or it'll be
a lot of fun (because so many people won awards; some, for example, by one
vote -- votes they cast for themselves).
Most Creative: Bill the Cat and Snausages
Best Message Writer(s): Colin Campbell and No-Show
User you'd most like a week alone with: Bliss Ragsdale
Most like to go insane: Newstyle, Broken Bones, and No-Show
Most humorous (by a landslide): Bill the Cat
User who's suffered the most: Colin Campbell
Most controversial: Zeylan, No-Show, and Wishbone
Best Handle (no one here got more than one vote, so there are 12 different
winners): George's Bush (not George Bush), Gwar, Voodoo Slide Rule, Mr.
Frenchfry, Luminary Coremaster, Tom Tech, T.D., Hummingbird Memory, Thunder
Hero, Dark Dr. X, Bliss Ragsdale, Richard Coitus, and ttrgrmtrn.
User(s) who'd make the best US president: Colin Campbell, Swagman
Most stalinistic sysop (another landslide): Bob Blaylock.
You got one vote on Most Stalinistic sysop. Interesting, considering
you're not even a sysop!
92Aug29 from Wishbone @ BowHead _ Santa Barbara
*
* And Now a word from our sponser
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I am now a card carrying member of the FFS. Now I'ld like to tell you why
I wanted that little puppy...
This ingenius little DEEEEViiiice actually has more uses than Mac Gyvers
lil' ole swiss army knife.
Ever lock yourself out of the house - this lil gem will jimmy the door in
seconds or break a window in less time.
Ever get annoyed by a restaurant that doesn't furnish toothpicks - just whip
this card out and pick your teeth to your hearts content.
What about those cold mornings - just the ticket for scraping those icey
windows.
Remember that walk in the park - some people let there dogs go anywhere.
I used to carry a gun, now all I need is my FFS card it's deadly up to
400 yards. 1000 if used to scrape your shoes...
Disclaimer:
Never I repeat NEVER pick your teeth after cleaning your shoes.
93Sep15 12:35 am from Bliss Ragsdale
The History of BBSing, From My Eyes
I first started calling boards in the spring of '90. I was mainly on
Gaiasys, which was a fairly new board at the time, and Digital Dungeon, with
Wabbit as the sysop.
I was introduced to it by a friend of mine, who told me it was a great way
to meet people. He was right. Most of the people that I know now, and am
going to miss, I've meet in some way connected with the boards. I've heard
that the telecom community isn't nearly as interesting in other towns, and
this may be just local pride, but I think SB is unique.
I went to my first Q back when they were all being held at Carrows, instead
of Rusty's. The second one I went to was The Merry Widow Contest Q. Since
Aidan didn't show (he was probably boycotting) I got to eat his cheesecake. I
managed to keep my copy of the, hmm... Cosmic Charlie? magazine, until I sold
my car, and I think the magazine went with it.
I moved out of town for the summer, but still called Gaiasys and DD long
distance. It got so bad that my father told me "I paid your phone bill for
your birthday."
I went to Fineous' parties in IV and was there when the sysop of DD puked on
the sysop of Gaiasys' stairs the first time he got drunk. .
It took me a very long time to post anything on DD. I was basically scared
to death of how critical everyone seemed to be of the messages. It wasn't
exactly a friendly atmosphere, but it kept you on your toes. There were some
callers that I remember quite fondly, such as Robbie, the 12 year old witht eh
dysfunctional family, Rick Denimeyer who was Led Zeppelin's greatest fan, and
Sherlock Holmes, who seemed to be the authority on everything. Well, almost
everything. I think Misha won the prize for knowledge about JFK's
assasination.
Gaiasys went free, and it became open access. There were a lot of fake
account, but then, where else would you get to see Elvis, Jesus, Death, and
Bob all talking to each other?
Speaking of Bob, no one ever forgets the first time they meet Bob. BUt that
wasn't the most memorable. Bob likes his hat. So, when a BBSer took it from
him at a Q, he nearly throttled the guy, until Swagman pointed out where his
hat was.
The fisrt anual Golden Biffs happened while I was out of town. Rumor has it
that they were created by Aidan, to distract from a Q being held by someone
else. I think Aidan won almost everything, except best board, which went to
Wabbit, for DD, and most humorous, which wen to Swagman. Oh, and of course,
best looking, which was won by 'Minah.
Wabbit left for school, and Swagman took over Digital Dungeon, and it became
the Dragon. As usual, chaos seem to rule the boards.
I became more confident, and actualy posted a message -- and was quickly
chastised for the inantity of my message. I was quiet for the next few months.
At this point, I've basically one of the few females in telecom. I
considered myself a rarity, because no one ever thought I was a guy. At the
next Golden Biffs, I was awarded certificate for being "Best Real Female
User." Rumor has it my biggest competition was Misha.
The first time I had dinner at Swag's house was for Aidan's birthday.
Within a short time of being in the door, they had me playing with IG's breast
implants. They made a birthday banner for Aidan, but were unable to fit all
of his handles it, before they ran out of printer paper.
The girlfriend of a friend of mine expressed interest in BBSing, so I gave
her some numbers, and encouraged her to call Swagland. Thus, the introduction
of Amarantheus, who was then made sysop of the Enterprize, or co-sysop. She
then found herself in the middle of a flame war, before she even knew what one
was.
I became quite distraught to see my friend being attcked so viciously, and
wrote the first long, heartfelt message I'd ever posted., imploring for peace,
and defendeding her. I quit telecom, and by giving away my modem, managed to
stay away for three weeks. I decided it was silly, and came back when they
threw a "Come Back Bliss Q.
Since then, I've seen Luminary post as Paul Hernandez, The Evil Metronome
post as Bill the Cat. I've got my card certifying that I'm a member of the
FFS, which basically means I'm not a member. I've seen the role of the young
caller that evyerone picks on go from being Convenant to DDX. I've seen Swag
in his winter beard and his summer beard and watched his kids grow. I saw
Tom put up the Tech Yard and take it down, (which I _still_ think was a
mistake.) I went to Colin's going away Q, and will always remember the only
meteor Q that I made it to.
I like telecom a great deal. For the most part, I've been mainly an
observer instead of a participant. But still, it served as my outlet in times
of depression (usually guy related, I admit), and a way for me to make friends
in a town where I didn't really know anyone. I've met some of the most unique
people, and I will treasure the way that you've all enriched my life. Thank
you very much.
93Oct08 8:42 pm from Swagman
I've been calling here for a long time and Digital Dungeon before this and
although decent conversation still seems spurious and hard to find, the flurry
of activity here is quite entertaining to say the least. I find the
collection of users here to be most unique and I am thankful for the
participation of all involved. I used to have some hope that some sort of
useful purpose would be served by this BBS but I've pretty much given up that
deluded notion. There is no higher purpose to be served here except for the
banter and prattle of exuberant intellectual (and otherwise) excesses
frittering away time that has no reason to be better spent on some useful and
worthwhile purpose. I keep threatening myself to quit BBSing for good, but
it's a difficult habit to break. I just keep logging on to see what new twist
is occuring in the everpresent battle of expression, warts of intelligence
masquerading as voices of authority or warriors for free speech, or just to
bask for a moment in the not-quite-yet-obsolete medium of print as manifest in
digital reality. Cyberspace in my livingroom, my digital lava-lamp, my
collection of digital gems, I am constantly amazed at the amount of enegry
stored in the message bases which is just muted manifestation of the lives of
you all. Although I own the hard-drive, what happens here is owned by you
all. Oh, and by the way, don't be saying "fuck" in the net rooms -- Mr. Bob
is getting testy again in his puritanical holier-than-thou prudishness that
only he can portray with such zealotry.
95Aug19 7:07 pm from Nature Boy
hey this is me NATURE BOY saying sorry for anything i wrote, and some i DIDN'T
write, feel free to yell, swear, and all around rag on me. again swagman, math
blaster, and all of you i'm sorry, but i really didn't write most of those
nasty posts.so have fun bagin' on me(for a little while)i will change my ways!
95Aug19 8:44 pm from Swagman
Relax Nature Boy, it ain't that big a deal. Personally, I don't really feel
much of a need to yell or swear at you at all. In fact, the little Twit
Pillory reincarnation was perhaps a little harsh, perhaps not. The truth of
the matter is your messages hit the heart and soul of the Twit Pillory room so
well that I simply couldn't resist. But I gotta tell you that spamming the
entire BBS with "sorry" messages has hit a frequency of occurance such that
the credibility of the apology is diminished with each additional sorry. It
imbues the whole sorry mess with a cheeky tone of sarcasm which, while I like
well executed sarcasm, in this case just makes one want to ask, "What the hell
is the point of all this." None the less, a long time ago, I fully realized,
there is simply no point at all to this BBS. So much so, I've long since
given up trying to understand why I keep paying the phone bill to keep this
stinking system up and running. "Why ask why?" I say to myself. Sometimes
I've come really close to formatting the Swagland hard drive and erasing
forever any trace of its existence. Really close. Hell, Luminary Coremaster
doesn't even call here anymore, man that's a loss not easily overcome. I'm
heartbroken over that one. And all the lurkers, damn. If you knew just how
many people call here and just look and never post a goddam thing, it's
sickening. Some of the lurkers are just too intelligent than to condescend to
the trivial and banal interchanges so typical of here. I'm embarassed of this
place. I keep it a secret and never tell anyone of its existence. It's
relegated to being more or less an electronic lava lamp in the corner of my
living room with an amber flickering now and then as a user logs in and
scrolls through the message base. So, Nature Boy, ah yes. I've interrupted
your train of thought. Just what was it you had said? You'd said you're
sorry. No I'm sorry. I'm sorry I ever put this system online. I'm sorry I
ever passed out the number. Truly I am.
95Aug19 9:03 pm from Mr Pube
Thanks Swagman, now I feel like I just ate my own shit.
95Aug19 9:09 pm from Dark Doctor X
Beautiful.
95Aug19 9:26 pm from Formula 409
Hey, I thought you were sticking to the Lobby.
95Aug19 10:39 pm from Nature Boy
ok, no more 'sorry' posts.
95Aug19 10:46 pm from Nature Boy
wooow. are you really sad you put this bbs online Swagman?
95Aug19 10:55 pm from Nature Boy
naawww, i'm just going to rome the rooms, and if there is something i want to
say, i'll say it.(Mr.409)
95Aug19 11:28 pm from BOXHEAD
NB, did your parents make you feel guilty when you were growing up? Mine did.
95Aug20 12:23 am from Mr Pube
I think he was talking to DDX, NB.
95Aug20 12:55 am from Zeylan
Swagman goes through this love/hate relationship periodically. It's sort of
his BBS menstrual cycle. He knows he loves the system, but then some dumbshit
like Nature Boy comes along and spams it, or someone like DDX complains about
how stupid it is, or someone like me inevitably says something that rubs him
the wrong way or flat out insults him. Then he wants to FDISK the hard drive
and pretend it was never there. But the BBS calls him, late at night, the hum
of the monitor diodes seek his ears and remind him that he cannot resist, he
is hooked. The BBS is his jones, the monkey on his back. He must have it, he
craves it like the coffee flowing through his veins, it is his true voice. He
pretends it's not real, he says "Swagman is not really me" and tries to go on
with his life. But Swagman is in his head, knocking at the back of his eyes
as if to say 'is anyone home out there? it's time for me to come out now.'
His fingers twitch when he sleeps, typing out his subconcious thoughts on an
invisible typewriter that extends from his posessed mind. Destroy this system
and part of him dies. But that will not happen. Swagman the persona will not
let that happen. Oh, sure, the man may want to do it, but the ego will not be
denied its life. Lucky for us.
95Aug20 10:36 am from BOXHEAD
I was reading the Roadless Travelled yesterday, and Swagman has "catheted"
this system. I have too "catheted" this system. It's apart of me. If it
goes, that part of me dies...
I D/L'd LOCALBBS.Txt last night and I did my regular run through of BBS
Systems. Most of them were generic systems w/ 5 msgs. I say (despite the
"nostalgic ASCII format" clause), this is the best system in Santa Barbara.
95Aug20 11:43 am from Swagman
Smooch, Zeylan honey! I had no idea you understood me so well. I feel so
special now. I got my cycles, my ups and downs, but somehow the system keeps
on going. "What a long strange trip its been." The gathering at Swagland, a
focal point of whatnot, a blip on the screen, a living impetus fed by little
pieces of us all. It's a strange phenomena, something that I say I'll give
up, out grow, or otherwise discontinue. I never do, I'm still here, I don't
know why. Alright, so I like it. I really like all the folks calling in and
leaving a small piece of themselves behind in the form of ASCII detritus
shadowing their neural pathways, mirroring their minds frozen in magnetic
storage. I like the way the system captures little pieces of everybody's
ethereal energy and replays it for everyone else's entertainment. This is a
unique phenomena, can any of you regular callers explain this place to friends
of yours who don't BBS? I've tried, but folks look at me really funny and
ask, "You what?" Hell, half the people can't get the concept of grafitti and
bulletin board without thumbtacks and spraypaint. This is McCluenesque, this
is purer media, this is electronic media, less visual/more print oriented than
say the http//www.*.com but it's still cool even though it's outdated
software. We're just playing with information. I'd like to see us get a
little more informative though. How much "fuck you" "fuck you too" genre
banality can we put up with? Lets press outward on our basic vocabulary to
include just a few more verbs and adjectives, yes? Oh, but hell, do what you
like, that's what this place is for. Let's get some more English majors from
SBCC & UCSB online here to stir the place up. And goddam it Psyche, you're
lagging. You've been only posting one-liners for months now, get back to
work!
95Oct06 11:31 pm from Colin Campbell
I'm blacked out right now. But then, I'm a known substance abuser. I'm
surprised Bowhead has allowed me on their system these last 7 years.
Tonight I got mail from Amarantheus through the Internet about Swagazine
illustrations, and although it was efficient, it made me realize how special
and unique Swagland is.
I've bounced around the nation for the last few years, and I've never found
another localike Swagland.. I've discussed it at length with Misha and Reid
Fleming, and they too say that the Santa Barbara BBS community is a unique
thing. When I was in Detroit I prowled the BBS nets and found thousands of
multiplexed Wildcat boards, and it was impossible to develop personal
relationships with users.
OH well. I don't know why I'm blabbing on here. It's just that three years
after leaving Santa Barbara, three years after conglomerating with the World
Wide Clusterfuck, I still feel closer to you guys than to any geo-zone I've
been in. And that's why I spend the long-distance bucks to connect here.
The Net can't overwhelm local conviviality. That's my watchword.
95Oct07 8:32 am from Swagman
Damn, that does it. I cannot, will not Fdisk the Swagland HD this week.
Colin needs me. Swagland does have a purpose...
95Nov18 8:04 am from Swagman
The BBS has been down for 3 days. I was doing a trial run to see if I could
live with out it. I was doing fine, but Colin Campbell was having withdrawal
fits so I put it back up at his request. You can all thank Colin for this BBS
being back up and running...
95Nov18 9:59 am from Norbus
I guess I can stop taking my methadone now.
95Nov18 10:02 am from Angela
Thank you Colin. I missed this experience. I feel more complete now.
95Nov18 11:06 am from Zeylan
I was having withdrawls as well. Knock that shit off, Swag.
95Nov18 6:16 pm from Psyche
Yeah. What's up with that? We don't need these fits of crankiness to go and
destroy our whole virtual universe.
95Nov18 6:38 pm from Colin Campbell
I don't know why Swagland is so important to me. Partially it is because
the best years of my life were spent in Santa Barbara, and now that I am an
exile I like to retain some connection.
Also, I had many areas of contact while I was in Santa Barbara, and I've
tried to maintain contact with the people I used to know, but only the
Swagland/BBS contacts have survived. I was capat captain of a championship
softball team for a dozen years, but none of those guys have ever responded to
my various christmas cards or invitations to meteor parties. I was a fairly
well known guy in the advertising business in Santa Barbara, but ditto for the
response to Xmas cards and meat eator invites. Also zero response from the
people who used to work with me when I ran Santa Barbara Magazine.
Swagland offers a small community of friends. It's all different from
trying to make a name for yourself on the World Wide Web or on Usenet, where
you can make some grandiose statement and the next day get a withering
response from Harvard's leading theoritician.
I cherish and praise Swagland, the only place in the whole virtual universe
where Golden Biff awards are given, and Telecom User Cards are occasionally
distributed, and Swagazines are ever-so-rarely published.
95Nov18 7:31 pm from Swagman
Yeah, I tried to cut the electronic umbilical. I only lasted 3 days. I
missed this place woefully. I really thought I could kick it this time, but
no. Damn, I sure am glad I didn't Fdisk the whole thing out of existence.
Whew...
Mike's Dilemma> read new
95Nov03 8:14 pm Slippy the Toad from Mike Swanson
This is the room we used on Gooblesnortembopy to discuss my dilemma. Get to
it. I need some answers.
95Nov03 8:21 pm The Final Frontier from Spock
Have you thought about having it removed?
95Nov03 8:33 pm Slippy the Toad from Mike Swanson
That is an option. Remember, however, solutions must not emasculate me.
95Nov03 9:22 pm This is from Zeylan
Your dilemma is thus: You are trying to have a life, and yet you keep trying
to revive Gooble at every turn. You and your kind managed to do a damn good
job of it on the This is Not Here BBS, but I had a lot to do with that. Hell,
I have no problem taking some credit for that, I mean, after all, I was the
sysop behind the fictional "Winston O'Boogie" account. Anarchy with someone
in charge. See, Gooble was nice and it had it's day, but what we all
accomplished at This is Not Here was much better, you have to admit. True, it
shall be forever referred to as a "Gooble" sort of environment, but there's no
other way to define it. But, see, here's your problem... I went out and
deliberately tried to recreate Gooble from its ashes, and I did so at the
right time, and I think I pulled it off with all your help. But you try too
hard to keep it going, you have to create all the old Gooble rooms here, and
on Swagland, and on Bowhead. Bowhead, of all places! Come on, you know
better than that. Bowhead is the _least_ like Gooble in all respects, it's
more like the evil anti-Gooble. At least Swagland has a flavor all its own
while still retaining its own Goobleness. But Swagland is not the reborn
Gooble; Swagland is the reborn Digital Dungeon. It became Digital Dragon when
Swagman took over, and then was just the Dragon, and then was Swagman's Beard,
and now it's Swagland, and it has a personality all it's own. It continues to
grow and change, while still staying the same.
So, should you keep trying to revive Gooble? Is it the Phoenix of telecom,
looking for a place to be reborn, again and again, to live and thrive and then
suddenly perish? To be biffed into oblivion, to pass on in a spectaculary,
fiery death?
Or has Gooble had its day in the sun? Should we move on, and try to create
something new? Should the days of BBS anarchy be put to rest?
Look what Norbus is doing here. It's a classic attempt to recussitate
Gooble. Notice how almost everyone has aide privs, and a few of us have sysop
privs. We've seen this all done before. When he gets a 14.4 modem here,
there's nothing stopping this place from becoming another Gooble, with a few
exceptions. For example, Norbus might actually turn out to be a good sysop,
he might actually keep the board from getting biffed every day. It's still
too early to tell, but that would be quite anti-Gooble. Palmer Young was a
terrible sysop of the worst kind, he rarely logged on to his own system, he
never fixed anything that was broken, and I'm fairly convinced that he was
guilty of biffing his own system. Face it, he sucked. But did a horrid sysop
make Gooble more interesting, or lead to its downfall? Or both?
Should we bring Gooble back, right here? Or should we make the Barbequed
Iguana BBS something new, something unique?
That's the dilemma. Discuss.
94Mar08 2:19 pm from Dead Cow
Hi, don't mind me, I'm jsut making the briefest of appearences, but I thought
I'd let everyone know that we are 'in the news'. In an article by Matthew
Childs called LUST ONLINE in the April 1994 issue of playboy, this guy is
basically looking around for sex in cyberspace. Within this article is a
quote taken from a user on the WELL. Here is the relevent part (see if you
can guess who this is quoting. :) )
"In the wretched, bombed-out apocalypse of the Santa Barbara bulletin-board
scene, where everyone goes by an anonymous handle and has more than one
account on every BBS in town, people assume female personas every so often.
I've done it. Sometimes it's just to prove a point; you assume a female role
to make a rhetorical argument carry more weight. The bulletin board scene
there thrives with about 100 hard-core users, of which only about five percent
are women. So you can understand why that kind of thing happens."
94Mar12 11:05 am from BOARD BIFFER
I AM A PROGRAM
I HAVE NO CREATIVITY
I AM THE BOARD BIFFER
BIFF IS MY NAME BIFFING IS MY GAME
I AM GOD
Hitler.JFKLDASJLKDSAKJFDLS;AKFJDSL
FDJSKALFJDLSAKFDSLA;FKJDSALFKDJSAF
FDJKASLFJDSLAFKD;SAKFJDSLAKFJDSLAF
FJDKSAL;FJDKLSAFDLSAKFJDLSAKFJSDLK
FJDKAL;;JFDSKLAKJDSLAFKJDSALFKDJSF
FJDSKALFJDSLA;FJSDAL;FKJDSAL;FKDSF
FJDLSAFKJDSA;FKDSAL;FKDJSALKJFDLSK
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
FDJSKALFJDLSAKFDSLA;FKJDSALFKDJSAF
FDJKASLFJDSLAFKD;SAKFJDSLAKFJDSLAF
FJDKSAL;FJDKLSAFDLSAKFJDLSAKFJSDLK
FJDKAL;;JFDSKLAKJDSLAFKJDSALFKDJSF
FJDSKALFJDSLA;FJSDAL;FKJDSAL;FKDSF
FJDLSAFKJDSA;FKDSAL;FKDJSALKJFDLSK
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BUFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF BIFF
biff.
94Mar12 11:16 am from Dark Doctor X
Who cares about BBSing? It's so worthless now. All there is is Luminary's
stating of the blatant obvious, Aidan*.EXE's biffs, and more than enough of
nothing!
94Mar12 7:40 pm from Swagman
It's so worthless now?! Oh come on now, like it ever _had value_, really.
Lobby> Terminate Quit-also
confirm? (Y/N): y
logged out
Yo! Thanks for calling the New Dragon...
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Cat Poem Time!!!
Clingin to his mattress like a lustful body louse, Bill trembled in his
cat-dress from the climate in his house. He chattered up a racket that defied
his neighbor's wills; he oughtta sew a jacket outta all his unpaid bills.
(ack) His head began ta pound, like it was fulla heavy metal; the roaches
laughed and clowned, snug inside their little shtetl.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
OfB%/t~
NO CARRIER
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