File name: BESTOF.BOB
Download time: 00:00:34
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Numb-> 0067 - ask CZAR
Sent-> 24-Feb-86 at 11:10 PM
From-> CZAR
For $9.95, you can join the Bob Blaylock Fan Club. After joining BBFC, you
will receive the following items in your BBFC package:
Blaylock's famous photographs which include "Rib-Q 1985", "Czar and Apple",
and other assorted favorites.
How many people new your friend Bob was a musician. With your club purchase,
you will receive "Sing Along With Bob". This album contains 40 of Bob's
greatest hits which include "You are the apple of my pie", "I'm a sex
machine", and "My apple is better than your Cray".
You will also receive many Books written by Blaylock. Selections include
"Tramiel, today's Hitler", "Your multi-user apple ][", "Build your own modem
in three easy lessions", and other award winning selections.
If you order before March 1st, you will also receive the following as a
special bonus:
* Official Bob Blaylock Hat
* Official Tracer Gun (autographed by Bob for an additional $.50)
* Additional 500 tracer pellots
* Wallet sized Blaylock pictures (12)
* And for you females, a full sized Bob Blaylock blow up doll
For $9.95, this offer is a steal. To join the Bob Blaylock Fan Club and
received your Blaylock package, send $9.95 to:
BLAYLOCK CLUB
6502 E. Wazniack
Dull, Kansas
99034
Limited supply - Allow 4-6 weeks for delivery
Numb-> 0074 - ask CZAR
Sent-> 25-Feb-86 at 6:57 PM
To-> LADY DI [REC]
From-> CZAR
No, no COD orders. All orders must be paid in SPAM, since that is what Bob
likes best!
Iron-ons and buttons are to be released next month. We are waiting till Bob
is done with the Gold's Gym workout plan. He should be even more muscular
after that!
Numb-> 0076 - ask CZAR
Sent-> 26-Feb-86 at 12:16 AM
From-> BOB BLAYLOCK
HMMM . . . I NEVER REALIZED BEFORE HOW MUCH I HAD ACCOMPLISHED--40+ GREAT
HITS, 3+ BOOKS, ETC. ANYWAY, CZAR, YOU FORGOT THE FAMOUS BOB BLAYLOCK LIGHT
BLUE COTTON JACKET, AND THE OFFICIAL BOB BLAYLOCK THINGS TO HANG ON YOUR BELT
AND STUFF YOUR POCKETS WITH. AND YOU MUSTN'T FORGET THE FAMOUS BOB BLAYLOCK
SHADES WITH THE PAINT PEELING OFF. (TRUE BOB BLAYLOCKS HAVE SENSITIVE EYES.)
BY THE WAY, CZAR, TWO OF MY OPERATIVES ARE NOW ARMED WITH THAT
INCRIMINATING PICTURE OF YOU PLAYING WITH AN APPLE. IT IS NOT TOO LATE,
HOWVER; YOUR REPUTATION HAS BEEN SOMEWHAT HARMED, BUT YOU CAN STILL SAVE SOME
OF YOUR HONOUR. IF YOU GIVE ME THE SYSOP LEVEL ACCESS TO THIS BOARD AND ONE
MILLON DOLLARS IN SPAM, I WILL STOP MY OPERATIVES FROM SHOWING HE PICTURE
AROUND. I FIGURE THAT YOU HAVE UNTIL THE NEXT S.B.A.C.E. MEETING TO PAY ME
OFF BEFORE YOUR REPUTATION IS SEVERELY AND PERMANENTLY DESTROYED.
Numb-> 0085 - ask CZAR
Sent-> 27-Feb-86 at 7:46 PM
From-> DEBI HOWELL
For all of you who haven't yet
purchased your Bob wannabe hat, I
suggest if you want to acheive status
and impress your bbs friends at the
next BBS Function, go to Woolworth,
on State and Anapamu, and buy one for
$2.99. They are in the front window.
Just ask for the
Original-One-and-Only Bob Blaylock
Hat. The salesperson will know what
you are talking about.
Hurry quick! That's cheaper and
quicker than joining the fan club.
And the hats are so "k00l".
I wore mine to the beach on Monday.
It was great.
Numb-> 0290 - COMPUTALK
Sent-> 18-Mar-86 at 12:56 AM
To-> All
From-> BOB BLAYLOCK
...BASIC is a tool of the devil; Satan uses it to lure us away from the
truth and light of strucured programming, and into the Fiery Abyss of
spaghetti code, undeclared variables, excessive use of GOTO, and other foul
evils. Beside that, Commie BASIC os one of the hardest versions of BASIC to
port over to a real computer.
On the other hand, If you are using a halfway decent implementation of C,
It should be very little trouble to port it over to my Apple and compile it
under Aztec C.
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
((
But wait! That's not all!
Included in this deal, you also get...
A set of stainless steel GINSU steak knives!
Yes! They slice, they dice, they can even
cut this '69 Ford Falcon IN HALF and still
cut a watermelon!
AND...
The Bob Blaylock Monogrammed, matching, his 'n Her
mechanical pencil set. Ideal for the person who
has nothing.
AND...
When published, you get Bob's unique philosophy
of "Yes! The world IS flat!" and "Yes! The Universe
is shaped like a rotten Banana!"
IF...
If you send in 2 cereal box tops you will be made
a member of the Blaylock family and adopted into
their household! You may EVEN get an official
Bob Blaylock Iron-On and official Bob Blaylock
$0 dollar bill (legal tender in Dull, Kansas
and the state of Utah). But, you have
to act FAST! FASTER! Accept no substitute!
Avoid the rush! The first 100 orders will
receive a Bob Blaylock official real imitation
pale-blue fishing hat, too! Be the first
on your block to look just like Bob does
(and without the hassle of major surgery, too!)
You must be %100 completely satisfied, or
you can return Bob, where he will stand on his
head and sing "My 'ol Man is a crazed, psychopathic
sex fiend!" backwards with subliminal messages.
ATTENTION!
You will ALSO get a package of Microscopic
space fleet, genuine fluff (straight from
Bob's belly button), peril sensitive
sun-glassess and a "Hi! I'm a Blaylock Clone,
How 'bout you?" button.
For speedy delivery, dial 1-805-555-1212
and say "Slime Mold" and you'll automatically
get a mystery gift in addition.
OR...
You can now dial 1-976-HI-IM-BOB! (50c charge, please)
for the latest Blaylock Party-Line info. You can yell and scream
at a recording for minutes on end while it attempts to indoctrinate
you with Blaylock's own twisted philosophy. (Sorry, no
phreaking to the 976 exchange allowed.)
Call 1-800-BOB-N-E-DA (Bob Any Day) if you're an official
BBFC member to find out about the exciting field trips planned.
Bob plans a trip to the moon in the space Shuttle in a few months.
If you live in S. California only, you can call
1-805-BLALOCK for the latest NERD NEWZ (kinda like the
Nude Newz) on what's trendy for S. California Blaylock Clones
and Pee-Wee Herman fans.
Yes, so act fast! Join the BBFC NOW! Join the amoral minority!
Combat Hunger, Gluttony, Communism, Capitalism, Religious
misconceptions, political and social ideologies, and yes,
even Khadafi himself! Vote: BLAYLOCK FOR PREZ!
Don't miss out! Remember the motto's: Is it live, or is
it (a) Blaylock (clone)? Be a Blaylock, or be a slime mold.
Join the BBFC or not at all!
(A)dlib by Misha- 1986. Slight alterations not permitted.
(A)dlib by Misha- 1986. Slight alterations not permitted.
-K00L, huh? Ho Hum.
Keep reading...
You see, the power of suggestion is very potent! Already
I can command you to do something, and you will! Ha!
BRSNRF! BRSNRF! Yes, that's right! I've just implanted
a subliminal suggestion into your subconsciousness
I dare you to record that sound and play it back at 33 1/3
speed backwards in stereo!
As you can see, I'm very bored right now. Oh, BTW,
I heard Debi is related to Bob through a distant cousin.
See what you learn when you keep reading! It's amazing, eh?
---- The End -----
Not already?! Well, look for Vol. II someday in the distant
future. Craig uses oreo cookies in wierd, kinky, satanic
rituals.
Lahgon. Pop Gahn Hmai. S'baidee Bpi Hmai Lao.
/Current_Events/Car_Insurance>
#853 89Sep06 20:42 From Malcolm
Hey, I got an old -64, anybody wanna buy it?
#854 89Sep06 23:01 From Bob Blaylock
There were a few enough of the SX-64s made that they might have some value
as a collectors' item. As a computer, they had an abysmal failure rate. I
could have made something far better than that in a second.
#855 89Sep07 17:09 From copy con
Have you ever considered making a computer? I would think it would be a
formidable task.
#856 89Sep07 19:15 From Swagman
Copy con, have you ever asked Bob about his first modem?
#857 89Sep07 20:07 From Malcolm
Ok...I admit it, the computer does suck......Still...anyone want to buy
it....cheap cheap cheap....
#858 89Sep08 17:34 From copy con
No. I didn't know he made a modem. What computer was it made for? I'm
guessing it was around 300 baud. Did it have a micorprocessor to handle self
power tests, memory?
#859 89Sep08 21:59 From Bob Blaylock
It was 300 baud and made to connect to my Apple ][ via the joystick port.
It made for a very interesting and enlightening project, after which it served
me as a marginally useable modem until I could afford a real modem. No, it
did not have any sort of microprocessor on it. It was extremely
unsophisticated. It used the TTL inputs and outputs on the Apple game port,
using one of each for the data lines (it was up to the CPU itself, running
machine language code written by yours truly) to convert the outgoing bytes
into serial pulses on an output line and the incoming serial pulses back into
bytes. Beside the data lines, I had another input from the modem for the
carrier detectq{_, and outputs to control the hook switch and the
originate/answer mode. Dialing was done by having my software pulse the hook
switch to simulate an old-fashioned rotary dial.
#860 89Sep08 23:07 From copy con
Interesting! Did you use 74-1487 74-1488? RS232 line drivers and recievers?
If it changed the bytes to serial then am I correct to assume to say it was a
parallel to serial conversion? I was at DOW and I saw in the surplus corner a
300 baud modem kit for $30, for the Apple. I find it fascinating that there
are chips that have 9600 modems and all you have to add are the audio
transformer, some filtering, a battery if you want it to be mobile, and I
guess that's it. Rockwell make it. A standard CPU I've seen be used is the
80xx series, like the 8031 or 8051.
#861 89Sep10 00:50 From Bob Blaylock
No, there was no RS-232 anything involved. The modem was based on a chip
put out by National Semiconductor, which was basically the guts of a 300-baud
modem in a chip. The interfacing was in the form of simple TTL signals
between the chip's data lines and TTL lines on the Apple ]['s Game I/O port.
The conversion to and from serial form was done entirely in software, by the
Apple's 6502. The terminal program contained a routine which had to be called
at intervals of no more than 1/300 of a second. When called, this routine
would check the state of the TTL input designated as the received data line.
If it found that that line was high (the normal state between charactersE/q)
then it would simply return with the carry bit clearedmy. If it was low, then
it would assume that it was seeing the start bit, so it would wait 1/300 of a
second, read the input again, shift that value into the first data bit, wait
another 1/300 of a second, shift that value into the next data bit, and so on,
until it had read in 8 data bits. To write data out the modem, another
routine would be called which would hold the output line low for 1/300 of a
second, set the output line to the state of the first data bit, hold it there
for 1/300 of a second, set the output line to the second data bit, hold it for
another 1/300 of a second, and so on until it had done that with all 8 data
bits, at which time it would pull the line high and leave it there, since high
is the normal state when no characters are being sent. I believe the 6502
source code is in one of the rooms here, if you're interested in seeing it.
In fact, I believe it's here even if you're not interested in seeing it.
#862 89Sep10 10:57 From copy con
Who did you talk to w/ this thing? Is it proper to assume that the same
device had to be on the other end also? I mean you had the modem , but did -
who ever you were going to call - the other end have to have ont to?
#863 89Sep10 12:43 From Bob Blaylock
Oh, there were not many BBS's back in those days, as far as I knew. This was
way before the Bowhead came into existence, I'm talking about the old days of
SB Telecom before I made my BBS list and everything.
93Dec14 12:39 am from Bob
This "Baby Driver" is an imposter. I had the opportunity to talk with the
real Cjear Goolsby, who used to be active on the BBSes under the name "Baby
Driver". He says he hasn't been on any BBSes for quite some time.
93Dec14 9:08 am Here's your new MCF from Zeylan
This "Bob" is an imposter. I had the opportunity to witness a hideous train
wreck in which the real Bob Blaylock was crushed under seven hundred pounds of
twisting molten metal. Needless to say, he hasn't been on any BBSes for quite
some time. Although he does still live with his parents.
93Dec14 2:29 pm reform from boris yeltsin
what a bummer. i didn't always agree with bob, but at least he was among the
more intelligent of the users. what will happen to his list now?
93Dec14 6:27 pm Yet another MCF from Zeylan
His list is computer generated by an artificial intelligence program, and it
always has been. That same program is the real identity behind all Bob's
accounts. Obviously the program still has a lot of really nasty bugs in it,
but those should all be fixed by the time "Bob, version 2.0" is released.
93Dec15 1:36 am from Bob
Alas, it's true. My body was killed a few months ago. I found out the hard
way that as rugged as it is, a 1969 Falcon station wagon is no match for
freight train. Fortunately, I had, by that time, moved nearly all of my being
into my computer. There's a few bits missing, now, but aside from those,
everything that I am, everything that made me "Bob", is still alive and
functioning.
The lack of a living body has turned out to be oly a minor inconvenience.
93Dec15 2:30 am reform from boris yeltsin
only a few bits? wow, if all you missed amounts to under a byte, that's pretty
impressive. care to share your secrets? like how did you translate the analog
brain to digital form?
93Dec15 9:12 am from from from from from Zeylan
The way I heard it was that Bob was tripping on crystal meth when he donned
his leather clown suit and went out to play chicken with the guys at Amtrak.
A sad, sad tale. By the way, Bob, did you manage to work out that glitch in
your programming that makes you want to be Mormon?
Sep 27 21:33 1999 from Rev. Null
I saw a reference to Bob Blaylock in the Metro, which is sort of the
Silicon Valley version of the Independent or New Times. It's in an
article about spam, and it has Bob giving one of his menacing statements
about his anti-spammer activities. It's in the issue that covers 23-29
Sept 1999.
Sep 27 22:15 1999 from salamander
Did it mention Bob's modem that used the Apple ][ joystick port?
Sep 27 22:39 1999 from Barry Brown
Do you have a URL for the article?
Sep 27 23:22 1999 from colin campbell
Come on, Rev.Null, exercise those fingers, or put your slave OCR to
work and tell us EXACTLY what the reference to Bob Blaylock was. It's
Santa Barbara against The World, after all.
I've about had it up to my eyebrows with Bob Blaylock, myself. It was a
jinxed moon that gave us the same birthday of November 15. When I first
joined the Santa Barbara BBS net I was overly impressed by Bob's tales of
tracking gray whales in the storm-lashed Bering Sea and battling camera
lubricants that froze up in Alaskan winter temperatures, and I developed a
mental image of this robust adventurer. Upon meeting the actual guy, who
is a fragile twig, I was even more impressed; but then I slowly became
aware that he is an anti-intellectual bigot, a hypocrit who screeches
about piracy in public while privately scurrying to my office to get
pirate copies of the latest software.
Bob has the sanctimonious self-righteousness that justifies, to him,
the punishment of all who hold differing views. The Web is overwhelmingly
a Libertarian environment, where individuals are free to go to hell in
their own handbasket, if that is their wont. Bob insists on supervising
all handbaskets. He even decided that he is in charge of what my guests
can do at my Meteor parties, which is why I'm glad God sprayed Cyalume in
his eyeballs.
Bob is an anti-creative retrolier who praises only those things that
are securely in the past and in his possession. We endured years and years
of his declamations that the apex of American car manufacture ended with
the production of the 1969 Ford Falcon station wagon, because that was the
car he happened to own. Then the Macintosh II was the only useful computer
on the planet, and then later, Macintosh operating systems that were too
advanced to work on a Mac II were degraded systems of the Devil for many
years, until Bob persuaded somebody else to buy him a more advanced Mac
hardware system.
I have been tolerant of Bob Blaylock over the years. I've acknowledged
his superior knowledge of Macintosh systems and sent him to my clients to
solve their computer problems for cash. I allowed him to attend my lavish
parties long after everybody else questioned my sanity for letting him
disrupt our festivities. I gave him a laser printer that cost me $4500
simplyy because he was the first to claim it after I said the first person
to claim it would get it, and then his first move was to remove my name
from the printer's Chooser address because it was offensive to him.
Bob Blaylock rolls on, contributing nothing but cliches, carping about
every advance, wishing for The Old Days when steam engines were the
latest advance, calling for Stalinist repression against any who complain
against his Utopian rule....
Bob: just go away.
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